


Got Your Back

by LyricalKris



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Drama/Romance, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-11-26
Updated: 2012-06-05
Packaged: 2017-11-06 23:35:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 34,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/424456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyricalKris/pseuds/LyricalKris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As a technical specialist, FBI Agent Riley Biers doesn't have all the guts or get all the glory as the field agents. What could he possibly have to offer resident hero and golden boy Agent Jasper Whitlock?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tkegl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tkegl/gifts).



_**Dedicated: To Tkegl ... because she purchased me... at auction.** _

_**But it was for a good cause...and she didn't make me write Carlisle smut! So yay!** _

**Disclaimer: Do I look like Stephenie Meyer to you?**

* * *

Being an FBI Special Agent wasn't as glamorous as it all sounded. There was a shit ton of paperwork, for one thing, and if you worked - as Riley Biers did - on the technical side of things, day to day life was downright dull.

Of course, there were perks. The work was interesting and important. And if he was being honest, Riley knew there were advantages to simply owning the badge.

"I would pay good money to see you try to work that badge," one of the other techs, Bree Tanner, snickered one day when he enumerated the benefits of their job. She grinned at him, flipping her long pony tail over her left shoulder as she shook her head. "Biers, smooth you're not. The way you mumble, you'd have a hell of a time even getting to that point in conversation."

Riley grimaced, pushing his glasses back up his nose. She was right, of course. About a year previous, when Bree was new to the department, she'd shown a great personal interest in Riley. He'd had absolutely no idea how to respond, and so had done his best to ignore her advances and flirtation. Finally, Bree had point blank asked him out for a drink. Quite a bit of stuttering later, Riley managed to convey that her lack of a certain appendage was a deal breaker for him.

Proving she was a good sport, Bree had taken him out for a drink anyway. After they talked, she accused him of being incurably shy. He'd protested. She challenged him to a flirt-off (her words) - whomever could get a date first won.

Bree won, hands down.

Even though it was a gay bar.

A wounded ego was a small price to pay for the friendship he found in his fellow tech-head, so he couldn't complain much.

Before Riley could think up a good retort, the doors of their lab came flying open. One of the other considerable perks of his job came bursting into the room.

Special Agent Jasper Whitlock was a legend at the Houston branch of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Working with a team who investigated kidnappings, the man had found himself on the wrong side of a case, being abducted in the place of a young girl the Bureau was trying to protect. He'd been viciously abused before the team could get to him. As a result of saving the girl from harm and surviving captivity, Jasper was something of a hero.

And he was ridiculously good looking to boot.

Ridiculously, fantasy-inducing, rugged scars and all good looking.

And he was headed in Riley's direction.

"Agent Biers," Jasper called when he was barely a foot in the door. "I need your help. We got a call on the Newton case."

Riley looked up as Jasper stopped at his desk, glad that when there was work to be done his mind shut off his typical nervousness, and he was able to concentrate on the task at hand. He was a professional. He didn't notice how stunningly blue the blond man's eyes were when he was so singularly focused. He didn't observe that the jagged scar over Jasper's right eyebrow and the one that bisected his chin only added to his outrageous beauty rather than detracting from it. He certainly didn't acknowledge that he felt a distinct, if ridiculous, thrill that Jasper had singled him out of all the techs.

"Biers! Did you hear what I said?" Jasper demanded, bending his face near Riley's and glaring with a harsh expression.

"Uh," Riley stumbled. "Yeah, of course. You need me to pull what I can from the sound file. I'm all over it."

"Good," Jasper said, straightening up again. "Be as quick as you can, Biers. Time is running out for this Newton kid. If we don't get to him soon they're gonna start cutting off body parts."

Jasper walked away as quickly as he'd come, obviously in a hurry to get back to his team. The minute the door slammed shut behind him, Riley let out a long, gusty breath, shaking his head sporadically.

A whistle drew his attention, clearing his head considerably. "You don't fuck around, do you?" Bree asked, sounding amused.

"What?" Rather than look at her, Riley busied himself, shoving the disc drive Jasper had left with him into his computer.

"You like him," Bree accused.

"Everybody likes Agent Whitlock," he muttered.

"Don't give me that shit, Riley. You know what I mean."

Riley sighed and growled under his breath. "So what if I do? What does it matter?" He slipped a pair of noise cancelling headphones over his neck, pulling up the right programs on screen. "He's so far out of my league, it's stupid to even talk about it."

Before she could respond to that, Riley brought the headphones up and over his ears, getting to work.

_**~0~** _

It took Riley twelve straight hours, listening to the four minute phone call over and over and over again before he heard, in the far distance, a siren.

In Texas, the old air raid sirens left over from World War II were tested the first Wednesday of every month. More than that, though, it narrowed their search area down to two specific locations.

It was more than Jasper and his team needed to solve the case. Once they had that information, the Newton boy was rescued and back in his parents' arms within 48 hours.

Riley was at his computer, as usual, working on some more mundane sound clean up from a bugged warehouse when the distinct noise of chattering drew his attention. He looked up in time to see Jasper push the door of the lab open. He leaned on the door jamb, his leonine figure looking, as usual, perfectly cut in his sharp suit. Riley bit his lip unconsciously.

"Hey, Biers," Jasper greeted with a grin that, had he not been seated, would have knocked Riley's knees right out from under him. "Get your ass out of that chair. We're going to the Cherry Pit."

"Wh-what?" Riley stumbled, unsure if he'd heard right.

Jasper pushed himself off the door and walked the few steps to Riley's desk, grabbing the other man by the arm. "Come on. That bullshit will wait. We're going to celebrate, and you're coming with us."

"Us," Riley echoed dumbly, letting Jasper pull him to his feet. He looked over to the doorway, belatedly noticing Jasper's team milling in the hallway. Waiting. "Oh, right."

"We couldn't have done it without you, buddy," the blond man said, clapping him hard enough on his back that Riley very nearly stumbled. Luckily, Jasper didn't seem to notice. He looked over at Bree and grinned. "You too, Tanner. You can buy this one a drink."

"Lucky me," Bree muttered, but she got to her feet anyway. "Sure, why not. Someone always gets drunk at these things, and I could use leverage on some of you fuckers."

Jasper threw back his head, laughing heartily. "You're alright, you know that, Tanner?" He shook his head. "You guys know where it is?"

"Sure," Bree answered for both of them. "We'll be there."

As soon as Jasper and his entourage had disappeared, Riley let out a soft groan, rubbing his eyes under his glasses.

Bree smacked him upside the back of his head. "What are you moaning about?"

"Christ! What the hell was that for?" Riley groused, rubbing the back of his head.

"Get your head in the game, Biers. We're going to a bar. There will be alcohol and the object of your affection." She grinned at him impishly. "This could be your golden ticket."

Riley scoffed. "Come on, Bree. You know that's not how the world works. This place isn't that much different than high school. The jocks don't mingle with the nerds." He sighed as he pulled his jacket on. He was more than aware of how they compared. He was skinny and awkward where Jasper was muscular and poised. Jasper was handsome, Riley was... well.. not. "Besides, he probably doesn't even swing my way, so the point is moot."

"Oh, he swings your way," Bree chortled.

Trying not to let on how curious he was, Riley looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "How do you know?"

"I have my sources," she said cryptically. "Anyway, let's get to the gone. One way or another, this shindig is going to be fun."

_**~0~** _

"Well, hell, look at this," the bartender said, throwing her arms wide as the agents filled her bar. "What can I do for the FBI? I have a speakeasy set up in the back, but they told me that wasn't illegal anymore."

"Rosalie! My angel!" Emmett McCarty, Jasper's partner, cried, throwing himself forward on the bar. "Give me a kiss!"

She smirked, putting a hand over his face and pushing him back. "You wish, McCarty."

Cackling, Emmett put his feet back on solid ground and wrapped an arm around Jasper. "You heard about the Newton boy?"

"Of course," Rosalie said, shaking her head. "Mike and Jessica Newton's only son, Eric, heir to Newton Outfitters Co. and a vast fortune therein. His kidnapping has been all over the news since last week."

"Well, he's safe and sound. All thanks to this man right here," Emmett said, thumping Jasper hard on the chest. The gathered agents let out a general whoop of excitement.

Jasper shook his head, grinning from ear to ear. "I wasn't working alone. This was a team effort."

"Well then. There's only one thing to do here," Rosalie said with a grin. "The first round's on the house for all."

That was met by a raucous cheer as the agents began to drag tables together.

Before Riley could sit down, Bree grabbed his arm, dragging him and pushing him into the seat at Jasper's right. Leaning away from Jasper, Riley hissed at her in a whisper. "What are you doing?"

Bree just looked at him innocently, depositing herself in the seat next to him.

Rosalie came by then, taking drink orders. Intimidated by Jasper's nearness - and holy Christ, he smelled so good, the flavor was almost edible - Riley blurted the first drink that came to mind. "Blueberry Bellini."

Of course, everyone seemed to hear him, and turned, incredulous smiles on their faces. "What?" Emmett snorted. "That doesn't constitute as a drink, Biers. That's chick stuff."

"Hey," Leah Clearwater protested. "I'm not gonna drink any of that fruity shit."

"I said it was a girl's drink," Emmett retorted.

"Yeah, Biers," one of the other agents, Tyler Crowley, joined in. "You're not gonna catch a woman with that."

"Maybe that's the point," Leah suggested. The others made a low, 'Ohhh' sound as they laughed.

Riley didn't say anything. He couldn't. His hands were tight fists under the table, but his tongue was tied.

"Hey!" Jasper interrupted in a loud voice. "That sounds pretty tasty, actually. The night," he consulted his watch, "errr, afternoon is young. Plenty of time for the hard shit later." He looked to Rosalie. "I'll take one of those... panini's too."

"Bellini," Rosalie corrected with a smirk. "Blueberry or peach?"

"Blueberry," Jasper said decidedly. He turned slightly, offering Riley a broad grin. "Like my friend here."

Riley felt his lips tugging up at the corners and he was helpless to stop it. He met Jasper's eyes briefly, hoping he saw the thanks there, before he looked down at the tabletop, blushing furiously.

**~0~**

Afternoon bled into evening, and the party raged on. Bree was having a great time, covertly snapping photos of the frivolity with her phone. That occupied her until a handsome man with thick black curls tapped on her shoulder. He introduced himself as Diego, and Riley could see that Bree was just done.

The accent was remarkably sexy.

Mostly, Riley watched the goings on around him.

Well, okay.

Mostly, Riley watched Jasper.

Jasper who liked the bellini so much he ordered a peach one just to try it. When he tasted it, he elbowed Riley's arm. "Good call, Biers."

On his other side, Emmett snorted. "Men do not drink this shit."

"Try it." Jasper slid his drink in front of Emmett. "I fucking dare you."

"Whatever," Emmett muttered, taking the drink and tipping it back. He smacked his lips, staring at the glass for a moment before raising it to his lips again, drinking more fully. "Holly shit. This is candy alcohol."

Jasper snickered. "Hate to say I told you so."

Grimacing, Emmett knocked back the rest of the drink. "You love to say I told you so." His phone rang then and he stood, heading to a spot that was a little quieter.

Watching Jasper toy with his empty glass, Riley considered buying him a drink. He was the man of the hour, after all.

Before Riley could even contemplate wiping off the sweat that accumulated on his palms at the very thought of making such a daring move, Emmett's voice boomed over everyone else's. "What do you mean, she got off? No. No. No. This is bullshit." He listened for a moment, and the bar became quieter as most everyone turned their attention to the very loud, large, fuming man. "Whatever," Emmett growled into the phone, hanging up with a scowl.

"What's going on?" Jasper asked, striding over to where his partner was now pacing.

"It's fucked up." Emmett sighed. "Jane and Alec Scarpinato are out on bail."

The crowd bristled, cries of "bullshit!" and "son of a bitch," going up. It was an unfortunate part of the job that no matter how tirelessly they worked, sometimes the bad guys got away.

It sucked... hard, but it wasn't that unusual, so it wasn't so surprising when most of the gathered agents shook it off. They all vowed to redouble their efforts - there had to be some way to nail the sadistic twins that had tortured little Eric Newton during his captivity. Then, they all shook it off and continued their celebration.

All of them except Jasper.

It was only because Riley was watching Jasper so intently that he saw the blond man's eyes go wide for an extended moment. He saw Jasper's nose flare as he breathed in deep once, twice, before a calmer mask came over his expression.

When Emmett threw an arm around his partner's shoulders, Jasper seemed to go stiff, his body language radiating discomfort. The larger man didn't seem to notice. "We'll get 'em," he said, steering Jasper back to the table.

The blond man grabbed Rosalie's arm as he sat down. "Whiskey. Straight. Please."

There was something in his voice... Something cloying and desperate. Riley couldn't put a finger on what it might be, but it made his heart do an uncomfortable twist in his chest.

There was something wrong. He knew it like a sixth sense. Like the other agents sometimes made a leap that solved a case.

Worried now, Riley watched the other man even more intently. Jasper had almost completely withdrawn from the conversation, only nodding his head occasionally to answer a question someone had asked. When his whiskey arrived, he shot it back without even looking at it and quickly ordered another.

When that drink was, likewise, gone, Jasper stood, ambling away from the table. Riley followed him with his eyes.

"Follow him," a voice hissed in his ear.

Starting, Riley turned to find Bree had re-joined him at some point. Though she had one hand tangled in Diego's hair, she was glaring at Riley impatiently. "You've been eye fucking him all g'damn night. Make your move."

Riley stood, pushing back his seat.

"Are you really gonna do it?" Bree asked, dumbfounded.

He had no intention of making any move. He was just increasingly under the impression that there was something very, very wrong with Jasper and no one else was helping him. He walked to the bar with ever slowing steps, not knowing what he was going to say.

He was well aware that Jasper's distress could be a product of his over zealous imagination.

Leaning against the bar, Jasper was downing what had to be his fourth shot of whiskey. As Riley hovered, trying to decide what - if anything - he should say, he saw Jasper tilt his head, leaning toward the man at the bar next to him and touching his arm with two fingers.

Startled, Riley stood still, taking in the other bar patron for the first time. He looked young - also blond, though his hair was a different shade than Jasper's. When he turned his head, Riley could see the stranger was handsome. Very handsome. His blue eyes were kind and his smile patient as he looked at Jasper.

Because he was a masochist, Riley stepped close enough to hear the conversation.

"I'm sorry," the stranger was murmuring. "I'm very flattered, but..." He looked up as a lovely young woman with caramel colored hair came to sit beside him. "I'm also very taken."

Jasper raised a shot glass. "Well, here's to that," he toasted, his words slurring around the edges.

He pushed himself away from the bar, almost running right into Riley. "Biers!" he said, looking startled. His eyes darted from Riley to the stranger at the bar and he chuckled, running a hand through his hair nervously. "I'm supposed to be able to tell these things, right?" He shook his head ruefully. "That one was so pretty... I thought for sure..." He shrugged. "Guess tonight isn't my night after all."

Riley found himself, as usual, too flustered to speak.

There were a thousand things he could have said. He could have commiserated: heaven knew the gaydar he'd been born with was defective at best. He could have offered any number of witty lines that translated to the fact if Jasper was looking to pick up on someone who swung just his way, he needn't look any further. He could have even laughed it off. Given the awkward tension that was growing between them, it might have been the easiest thing to do.

Instead of doing any of those things, Riley swallowed hard, looking at the ground.

"Yeah, okay," Jasper muttered. "It's the twenty-first century, asshole. I can be an FBI Agent and still fuck men senseless."

Before Riley could say anything, Jasper had spun on his heel, walking as quickly as he was able - drunk as he was - over to the table. He grabbed his jacket, pulling it on. "I gotta get out of here, McCarty."

Emmett turned in his seat, looking like he was about to argue. His face fell slightly at whatever he saw in Jasper's expression. "Everything okay, man?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm just getting drunk. You know I'm an obnoxious drunk and Tanner over there has been taking damning pictures all night."

Emmett swung around in his chair to glare at Bree. "Tanner, no way. That's not kosher."

"What?" Bree said innocently. "He's lying. I absolutely don't have a picture of Rosalie slapping the hell out of you."

"She didn't slap me."

"Oh, yes I did. Pinch my ass again. I dare you. See where I hit you this time."

Having shifted the attention well away from him, Jasper made his way to the exit. Desperate not to let the other man leave thinking he was a homophobic asshole, Riley finally found his voice. "J...Agent Whitlock," he called.

"Fuck off," Jasper said over his shoulder and walked out of the bar, into the cold evening.

Wondering how things had gotten so spectacularly fucked up in the space of a minute, it took Riley unforgivably long to make his feet move again. He raced out the door without a clue in his mind what he was going to say when he caught up with Jasper.

If he caught up with Jasper.

Riley looked back and forth, trying to figure which way the man had gone. He thought he spotted the trail of the blond man's trench coat disappearing around a corner and ran in that direction as quickly as he could, stumbling once along the way.

As luck would have it, Jasper was rounding a second corner as Riley came around the first. With a groan, Riley pushed himself forward, urging himself to go faster.

When he rounded the second corner, Jasper was no where in sight. He paused a moment, trying to catch his breath, before walking forward, confused. There was no where the other man could have gone.

Suddenly, a pair of hands darted out from an alley way. Riley cried out, surprised as he found himself pushed up against a brick wall with a gun digging into the skin of his chin and Jasper's furious brown eyes on him.

Riley blinked. Jasper's eyes went from hard to startled.

"I'm not a homophobe," Riley blurted. "It wasn't that. It was... It was just... you."

Jasper looked confused. "What was..." Then he let out a breath of air and quickly stepped away from Riley. "Look, Biers, I'm sorry." It didn't escape Riley's notice, even then that as he tried to reholster his gun, Jasper's hands were trembling. "Let's chalk it all up to drunkenness, alright? No harm, no foul?"

Dumbly, Riley nodded, his nervousness returning in full force.

"You should know better than to sneak up on an armed man, anyway," Jasper said, trying to make light of the situation.

"I-It's okay. No big deal," Riley managed.

Looking slightly relieved, Jasper absently straighted Riley's coat.

"Are you.. I mean, I've only had the one drink. I could drive you home," Riley offered, surprised when he didn't stumble or trip over the words.

"No," Jasper said quickly. He gave an uncharacteristically nervous chuckle. "No. I'm fine. I live just a few blocks that way."

Riley felt a strange urge to not take no for an answer. "Are you sure you're okay?" he hedged.

Jasper looked up, and for the space of a breath Riley could swear he saw something... almost vulnerable in the other man's eyes. It was gone in a heartbeat. "I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

Since he had no answer for that, Riley could only watch as the blond man walked away.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to bmango and barburella for prereading and jfka06 for beta services. I love you.**

**So uh... Tkegl... are you... pleased, thusly? *wide eyes***

**3-5 chapters, from what I'm looking at right now. We'll see how it goes.**

**Incidentally, I did a DIFFERENT Jasper/Riley fic for the FGB compilation entitled "You'll Find Yourself" - if you got it, let me know if you read and what you thought!**


	2. Chapter 2

Six months.

It took six months for Jasper to get his head on straight after he'd been abducted and tortured by the very monsters he'd been hunting. His injuries weren't as bad as they looked. Gruesome, yes, but they'd long healed to livid scars before Jasper could firmly plant his feet in reality again.

For all those long months, he'd battled crippling paranoia and panic attacks. The few nights he could sleep were plagued with nightmares so vivid, he woke screaming, unable to tell for minutes on end what was real and what was the product of his night terrors.

The first three months were the hardest. So deep in denial he was drowning, Jasper had insisted there was nothing wrong. He was an FBI Agent with years of training; he wouldn't be afraid. How often had he lashed out at his lover, Peter, whenever the poor man dared to suggest he needed help. His anger had bordered on violence, Jasper was just that desperate to cling to the belief that he was the same man he'd been.

It took Peter leaving him to wake Jasper up. He needed help. If he didn't get it, he couldn't hope to function, let alone to return to the job he loved.

"Baby," Peter had said, his hand on the doorknob. "I don't want to leave. But I can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped."

Reluctantly, Jasper dragged himself to the team of psychologists his A.D. had provided for him. It was a struggle - he hated admitting that he needed any kind of therapy - but he'd forced himself to keep an open mind.

He had to acknowledge, it helped. A lot.

He'd worked hard until he was stable enough to pass the psych evaluations that would ensure his return to work. Once he was back on the job he felt better, more in control. His higher ups started him off slow, not pushing him into field work right away even though Jasper claimed he was ready for it. Instead, he got to savor the endless monotony of background checks and the like as he worked back up on several cases for months.

Then this case.

There was no denying that Jasper was good at what he did. Despite the fact his A.D. looked wary about throwing him back in the field running, there was also a young, frightened child to take into consideration. Little Eric deserved every chance.

Jasper had been fine, more than fine throughout the whole case. In fact, in the last year, he had rarely felt better, more energized, and filled with purpose. He belonged on the job, working cases.

Then, the phone call.

In the space it took Emmett to mutter his furious words - that Jane and Alec Scarpinato were free on the streets again - all of Jasper's self confidence drained from his body. For one, two, three long beats, every muscle in his body tensed with complete terror.

History was going to repeat itself - for those breaths, he was sure of it.

That was exactly how it had happened the first time.

The victims in the first case were the Brandon girls: Mary Alice and little Cynthia. They'd been found, traumatized but intact, and their kidnappers, James Hunter and his followers, had been sent off to prison. Then, like now, some benefactor with deep pockets had bought their way out of trouble.

Jasper could guess that Hunter's first order of business would be to go after the girls with a vengeance. It was a guess that proved accurate. Finding Alice's bodyguard shot to death, Jasper had only barely gotten to the little girl, knowing her hiding spots well, before James did.

"Take her, McCarty. Run," he'd yelled at his partner, thrusting Alice into his arms. "I'll cover you. Go!"

He'd spun, pulling a gun on James just as the man pulled a gun on him.

It would have been fine, back up was on its way, except that Jasper hadn't counted on Hunter's girlfriend, Victoria, being right behind him.

He supposed he should count himself lucky. Rather than blowing his brains out, Victoria had merely cold cocked him with the butt of her gun.

But what Jasper had endured in Alice's stead more than left its mark, and for a few seconds, after Emmett announced that the Scarpinato twins were free, he was convinced it was going to happen all over again.

Jasper awoke the morning after with a strangled gasp, struggling to breathe. He didn't remember the nightmare he was waking from. He was covered in sweat and his pulse was racing. His hand was gripped painfully tight around his gun.

With a growl, Jasper set the weapon down on the end table and leaned forward, his head in his hands. He wasn't even in his bedroom. He remembered finally making it home last night after the longest two block walk in the history of the planet. He'd entered his apartment, gun drawn, and searched every inch of it, looking for signs of an intruder. Then he'd double checked each lock on each window and door. When there was nothing left to do, he'd sunk into his recliner in his living room, gun at the ready, fighting sleep for as long as he could.

In the light of day, Jasper felt considerably calmer. The more he looked back at his behavior the night previous, the angrier at himself he got.

It had been a long while since he'd had an episode even close to this. It would have served him right if he blew off some important body part as he slept. What kind of an idiot slept with a gun in his hand?

Grimacing, Jasper remembered the pretty blond man from the bar. He'd been desperate last night, all right. Not that the man wasn't attractive - attractive was just the tip of the iceberg - but Jasper couldn't believe he'd been so sloppy as to hit on a man with his fellow agents just a table or two away.

It was just that he'd been terrified to go home alone.

Jasper was not ashamed of his sexuality in the slightest. He simply preferred to keep his sex life separate from work. It had been a major bone of contention between him and Peter. His lover hadn't liked that Jasper simply stayed home on nights of big company parties. When Jasper went out with the guys to celebrate a win, Peter was never invited.

Though there were times he missed Peter so much it made him dizzy, Jasper knew it was best that he'd gone his own way. He absolutely believed that his lover deserved to be put first. The problem was, it was hard to think that way when someone, particularly a child, was in danger.

He was a company man. That's just the way it was. His job was important to him.

Carefully, Jasper replayed the events of the previous night, trying to gauge if he had any damage control to do. He smacked his palm hard against his forehead when he remembered Riley Biers.

Riley who'd seen him hit on the blond at the bar.

And who'd then followed him, making Jasper's hyperactive paranoia flare.

He'd pulled a gun on a fellow agent.

"Fuck," Jasper muttered out loud, rubbing his eyes hard.

Riley hadn't seemed angry about it, but Jasper couldn't trust his judgment. He'd been fairly inebriated at that point and scared out of his mind besides. Now that he was calmer, and his rational mind could wrap around the fact that Jane and Alec were no more than spoiled children who'd gotten caught up in a game they shouldn't have been playing, Jasper decided the best course of action was to reassess if Riley would cause any problems.

~0~

First thing that morning, Jasper headed to the lab instead of to his place in the bullpen. Riley was there, as he always was, eyes glued on the screen in front of him, huge headphones over his ears and his glasses sliding down his nose.

Jasper resisted a smile. He had a soft spot in his heart for geeks. There was just something about them that charmed. As far as the FBI geeks, Riley was, hands down, his favorite. He was cunning - more detail oriented than the others and more likely to catch something big. Sure, he was a little, well, loopy, but he was always quick to understand what Jasper needed.

All the more reason he needed to make sure their working relationship remained easy.

For a long moment, Jasper studied Riley, trying to formulate a vague plan of attack - so to speak. Jasper knew he was good with words. A smooth talker, Peter used to call him.

Riley looked to be in his mid-twenties. Just a kid, really. He, like so many of the rookies, had often looked up at Jasper with hero worship in his eyes. It shouldn't be too hard to smooth things over if his feathers were ruffled.

Resolved, Jasper strode forward. He stood in front of Riley's desk, an amused smile beginning to tug at the corners of his lips when the younger man remained oblivious. "Agent Biers?"

A scoff drew his attention, and Jasper turned his head to see Agent Tanner was shaking her head. "He's in the zone. You'll have to throw something at him to get his attention."

"Hmmm," Jasper hummed contemplatively. Rather than throw anything at the man, he reached over, tugging the head phones off his ears.

"Hey! What... oh." It was almost comedic the way he narrowed his eyes, looking as fierce as an attack dog whose bone had just been stolen away, but the moment he realized who was standing in front of him, his eyes went wide. "A-agent Whitlock."

Jasper resisted the urge to grimace when Riley quickly looked away. Instead, he cleared his throat and kept his tone light as he spoke. "Agent Biers... I was wondering if you were free for lunch today."

Riley's head snapped up, his lips parted in surprise.

Realizing that it must have sounded like a proposition after what Riley heard the night before, Jasper was quick to amend. "I'd just like to apologize for my er... behavior last night." He shrugged lightly and looked to Bree, giving her a winning grin. "I'm just glad Tanner and her cell phone footage of shame weren't around." He looked back to Riley. "So... lunch? On me?"

Riley was looking down again. Jasper noticed his hands were clenched into such tight fists that his knuckles were white. He nodded once, just a jerk of his head.

Jasper walked away, not entirely sure what to make of Riley's behavior toward him.

_**~0~** _

"So look," Jasper began after they sat down and ordered. "The whole thing with the gun... that was... supremely uncalled for," he said softly, his tone absolutely apologetic.

"I, um..." When Riley spoke, or rather, tried to speak, he kept his eyes on the table, not looking at Jasper at all. It was really beginning to irk the blond man. For one thing, without looking in Riley's eyes, he was having trouble figuring out if the younger man meant what he said. For another, the whole apology just worked better if Riley was looking at him. "It wasn't... It's not a big deal."

"You know," Jasper said slowly, trying to temper his annoyance. "If I make you so uncomfortable, you shouldn't have agreed to come out with me."

That worked. Finally, Riley's eyes darted up to his, saucer-like. Then, inexplicably, he started to laugh.

Well, no.

He started to giggle.

It might have been adorable if Jasper wasn't so irritated. "I'm really not sure why this is so funny to you."

"Oh, man..." Riley said with a groan. He leaned forward, his elbows on the table as he ran his hands through his hair restlessly, making it stick up in every direction.

He looked like he was fourteen years old when he did that, Jasper realized, and his lip twitched upward.

"It's just that... you keep thinking I'm bothered by you," Riley stammered, looking down at his fingers which tapped out a restless tattoo on the tabletop. "I'm not bothered by the fact you uh... you like men." As Jasper watched, his cheeks got progressively redder. Riley's fingers were moving so quick against the tabletop now it would have made Jasper anxious if he wasn't so curious. "I like men, too," the younger man finally said.

For a handful of heartbeats there was a slow, mildly awkward silence between them. Then, Riley laughed again, hanging his head as he shook it back and forth. "Fuck. That was... totally high school, wasn't it?"

"A little," Jasper answered, chuckling softly. The negative tension between them had dissipated, and he felt more relaxed, honestly believing the other man's nervousness had nothing to do with his actions the previous night.

Riley's smile was rueful. "I'm not any good at this stuff."

"What stuff is that?"

"Oh, um... talking, I guess?" He tugged at the sleeves of his jacket.

"I never noticed it before," Jasper observed.

"Well, I don't get like this at work," Riley said, tilting his head as if this should explain everything. When Jasper only looked back at him questioningly he frowned, obviously searching for the right words. "All the computer stuff? I don't know... I feel in control there. I have my part to do, and I can do it."

Jasper watched, momentarily fascinated as the other man's lips quirked, twisting at the corner as he pressed them tightly together. "People are different. You can't figure out what they really want because everyone is always playing the game." He sighed. "And I know me. I'm easy. I've got a big target on my head that other people can see that says 'play me.'"

He wasn't whining, Jasper realized. He was merely presenting reality as he saw it.

Turning over his words, Jasper was startled to realize just how much he was playing into Riley's expectations. While he was sorry he overreacted, hadn't the whole point of this lunch been to make sure Riley wouldn't cause any problems for  _him_? "I understand what you mean," Jasper muttered.

~0~

Right after the incident, when his wounds were slightly less grisly looking, young Alice had come to visit him in the hospital. Her parents said she insisted - absolutely wouldn't let the matter drop until she saw with her own eyes that Jasper was indeed alive and getting better.

Since then, Alice came to visit him at least once a month. Mostly, she stayed with him for a few hours while her mother went shopping. She said he was the only one who would actually play Chinese checkers without letting her win.

"You're quiet today," Jasper observed softly, watching her as he had been since she arrived. Quiet was not typically a word that applied to Alice. It happened sometimes, though. Having been through something as traumatic as she had, Jasper knew from experience that Alice sometimes waited, bottling up her fears so she could talk to him instead of her parents or even her therapist.

She looked down at the board, rolling a marble between her fingers. "Do you have friends your own age?"

"What?" he asked brilliantly. The question caught him off guard. `

The little girl sighed. "Mommy said I can't be just friends with you," Alice said quietly. "She said I have to have friends my own said it isn't normal to not have friends." The raven haired child looked up at him with big, sad eyes. "Do you have other friends?"

Jasper opened his mouth to say of course he did but then slowly shut it again. He tilted his head, really considering the question.

Did he have friends?

He used to. He remembered his buddies from the academy and a few of Peter's colleagues that they occasionally spent the weekends with. It had been so long since he'd seen any of them. Oh, sure. He went out with Emmett and the other agents to celebrate a win, but would he consider any of them true friends?

He supposed not.

"What about the kids at school?" Jasper asked gently, deflecting.

Alice shrugged. "Sometimes I play with them, but I don't like their games." She made a face, not really looking at him. "They pretend play guns, and I don't like guns. And then they pretend play house. They," the way she spat the word let Jasper know she was talking about James, Victoria, and their friends, "made me pretend play house. I don't want to play that game anymore."

Jasper's heart ached for the little girl. If James and his crew weren't already dead, he would have tracked them all down and wrung their necks with a smile.

"We don't need them, right?" Alice asked, looking up at him with an easy grin. "We have each other."

Again, Jasper's heart seemed to twist in his chest. He got up from his seat, going to sit next to the girl on the couch. "How about I make you a deal? Promise me you'll try being friends with one of these kids, any of them. Why don't you suggest the game you want to play? And if you try, I'll try too."

Alice looked dubious, screwing up her lips as she watched him. Then she stuck out her pinkie. "Promise?"

Solemnly, Jasper wrapped his pinkie with hers. "I promise."

_**~0~** _

A few days later, at work, Jasper found himself recalling his pinkie swear with Alice.

He could have lied.

Alice would never know that he hadn't kept his promise. If he told her he had, she would believe him without question. She trusted him that much.

Still, her innocent question had stuck with him.

When had he lost all his friends? There had to be something off that he was a thirty-two year old man and his best friend in the world was eight years old.

Sure, he was married to the job, but the sudden realization that he now had  _nothing_  outside of it hit him hard.

Thinking back on his life before the incident, Jasper ached for Peter again. Peter had at least attempted to bring something different to the table, always trying to drag him to plays or art galleries or whatever else was going on in Houston. Once, they'd driven to Dallas for a Cowboys game. Jasper fondly remembered that Peter rooted for the opposite side just to mess with him. They'd had a good time though - cheering and whooping and generally getting all riled up.

Good things happened when he and Peter got riled up together.

Shaking away that memory, Jasper dragged out his phone, flipping through his contact list idly. No name stood out. He remembered the way some of his old friends looked at him after he got out of the hospital and automatically bristled.

His old friends looked on him with pity. That's why he'd stopped seeing them, he remembered. He just couldn't take the look in their eyes.

His work colleagues looked on him like he was some sort of demigod, and while that was preferable, it was also infinitely more exhausting.

Suddenly, Riley's observation came back to him. People were always playing a game. Jasper gave a chuff of laughter at the thought. It was so true. He should know. His guard was constantly up.

Riley's wasn't though, that much was obvious. From the conversation, Jasper could tell that one of the things the other man lamented was that he didn't seem to be capable of playing the game - putting up a mask that was more confident and self-assured.

Socially awkward, Jasper would have called it before.

Now it was looking more and more like Riley was simply honest.

Making a split second decision, Jasper changed his course, heading down to the lab rather than out the door to lunch by himself. He grinned when he got there, seeing Riley again rapt with concentration at whatever was on his screen.

Reaching over the computer monitor, Jasper knocked the other man's glasses off the tip of his nose. He laughed lightly as Riley automatically scrambled his hands across the desk, searching for them. The younger man fumbled, shoving them back on and looking up at Jasper with those wide, always startled eyes of his. "Hey, Biers," Jasper managed between chuckles. "How about some lunch?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: To my cheerleaders who put up with endless amounts of crap from me: jfka06, bmango, barburella and beta of speediness, the ever so sexy jadedandboring. MWAH.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Omg, you guise.You should check out the banner that Tkegl did for me. It's in my profile and it's GORGEOUS. (on FFN)

The first time Jasper asked him to lunch, Bree was all over him.

"What behavior has he got to apologize for? Riley this is so not cool. You told me nothing happened last night, even though you two disappeared outside together. I told you everything that happened with Diego," she whined

"I asked you not to," Riley reminded her. "And nothing happened - at least, nothing that would interest your gutter mind."

"What'd he do? Puke on your shoes?" She rested her head on her folded hands. "That's how they say I love you in some countries."

The corner of Riley's mouth turned up on one side. He tapped the side of his desk in agitation, trying not to think about the way Jasper grinned when he asked him to lunch.

His smile made Riley feel as if his insides were made of thick, warm fudge.

_Mmmm. Little dribbles of hot chocolate on those full, pink lips..._

"Biers!"

Riley jumped in his seat and looked at Bree sheepishly. "Um. He just feels bad because he pointed a gun at me," he mumbled.

"He what?"

The sharp crescendo of her incredulous tone brought Riley back into the present. He realized belatedly that having a gun shoved in his face wasn't something to be treated so lightly. "It's not a big deal," he said, hoping she would drop it.

Of course, she didn't. "Are you mental?"

"He was drunk, and I snuck up on him," Riley said, defensive on Jasper's behalf. Internally he was cursing his defective filter. He had a knack for saying exactly the wrong thing - the kind of thing most people were wise enough to keep to themselves.

"Who do you think you're talking to here? Stealthy you aren't, Riley." Bree's tone was disturbingly serious. She was actually concerned. "If he freaked out on you and pulled a gun while you were clomping after him..."

"Bree, please don't make this more than what it is," Riley pleaded. "It was fine, okay? The second he had me pinned against the wall, he saw who I was, and he backed off."

She stared at him. Riley held his breath, terrified that he'd just brought trouble down on Jasper's shoulders.

Her lips twitched. "He pinned you against the wall, huh?" Her eyebrows wagged. "In the alley?" she guessed.

Riley stared down at his desk but he grinned.

"Oh, my," she chuckled. "Well, that's going to feed your spank bank for years, isn't it?"

The way his cheeks flushed crimson answered for him. The night before, those moments when Jasper was pressed up against him, body to body, had played over and over in his head - minus the gun of course. Or rather, with a very different gun.

The incident had done nothing to discourage his hopeless crush.

"Be careful, Riley," Bree said softly, her tone serious again.

He blew out a long breath. "Don't get dramatic, okay?" he said, trying to play it off. "I mean, it's not like this is a date or anything. He just wants to apologize. That's all. It's a non-issue. Nothing's changed."

_**~0~** _

After that, it was weeks before Riley saw Jasper again. He had ample time to go over the whole lunch he spent with the blond man. He'd had the time to lament every misstep and blurted word.

Word vomiting that he liked men?  _Brilliant._ _Very_ _subtle._

Then the whiny babbling about the people who played him versus the computers he could control?

_Nice_ _touch,_ _Biers._ _Truly._

He'd finally managed to remind himself that Jasper Whitlock was way out of his reach when the man reappeared in front of him.

Being all playful.

With his grin that felt like coming home to a fire on the hearth and a need in the pit of his belly.

Inviting him to lunch for no reason at all.

"Ummm. Yes. Yeah. Sure," Riley finally answered.

Jasper's smile got wider. "Good." He stood up straight, looking at Riley expectantly.

"Oh! Now," Riley muttered, jumping to his feet.

Jasper's eyebrows crinkled in the middle. "Well, yeah. It is lunchtime."

"Yeah..." Riley tried to smile but he was sure it came out twisted. "Yeah, okay. Let's go."

As they walked, Jasper kept up a line of conversation that Riley barely followed. He answered yes or no where he knew Jasper was expecting an answer, but otherwise was lost in his own thoughts.

He just didn't know how to react to Jasper's sudden invitation. Riley wasn't entirely naive. He knew the first time they'd had lunch was all about the blond agent covering his ass. The younger man could understand that. Career setbacks at the Bureau were not easy to recover from.

"Hey, Biers," Jasper said, looking amused. "I'm not gonna bite you."

"What?" Riley stopped short. "I'm not... I didn't think you were gonna..."

"Jesus," Jasper said, laughing incredulously. "I was joking, kid." Pursing his lips, the blond man looked at him curiously.

"I'm sorry," Riley muttered, feeling his cheeks get red. "I told you... I have trouble reading people, knowing what they want from me."

"Hmmm," Jasper hummed in acknowledgement. He didn't speak again until they were seated. "You can tell me to fuck off if I'm sticking my nose where it doesn't belong, but what happened to make you so suspicious of other people?"

Shifting restlessly in his seat, Riley answered the only way he knew how: honestly. "It's not other people... it's me."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," Riley hedged, fiddling with the edge of the menu in front of him. "I just have a habit of saying stupid things or not knowing when to shut up." He shrugged. "Like now."

"I asked you," Jasper pointed out.

"That's true," Riley allowed. "But … other people... they would know if you were just trying to be polite."

"I'm not being polite," the blond man interjected. He grinned. "I'm being phenomenally nosy, actually. And I'm still not sure I understand."

To occupy his hands, Riley began to stack the bowl of creamers that sat on the table. "There are just things that people learn to pick up on. Social cues, I guess. I, um... I suppose I'm just defective." He tried for a smile to lighten the mood, probably failing miserably. "Like, uh... when I was in high school, I had to learn the hard way that if you're a guy, especially a guy like me, you probably shouldn't let the school's football super star that you think he's sexy." He looked up, meeting Jasper's eyes for a moment. At least he'd learned that lesson well enough not to repeat it now.

"What was the hard way?" Jasper asked, his features inexplicably concerned.

Riley's lip twitched. "Well, he beat the crap out of me." He shook his head. "You can't possibly be interested in this."

"I'm interested in why you think that was your fault."

"Well, obviously he was a prick. I'm not saying I deserved to get my ass kicked. But come on." He looked at Jasper shyly. "Would you have come out and said something to the big, tough, probably straight jock... in front of his friends, no less?"

Jasper pursed his lips, not saying anything.

Looking back down at the table, Riley smiled sadly. "Yeah, I thought not."

_**~0~** _

Of course, Bree could be depended upon to badger him until he went over the details of their lunch point by point.

"I didn't know all that about you," she said when he was finished. There was a slight pout to her lips.

"You didn't ask," he pointed out.

"But Jasper did," she mused aloud.

"What's your point, Bree?"

She shrugged. "No point. AD Banner came by with some images that need to be analyzed. I sent half of them to your inbox."

Riley breathed a little easier. Business as usual he could deal with.  _Sounds_ _good._

As he pulled up the files on his computer, trying to let his hyperactive mind slide back into work mode, he became aware that Bree was humming and singing softly.

"Getting to know you, getting to know all about you..."

"Bree," he said warningly.

"Getting to like you. Getting to hope you like me."

"Bree!"

"Hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, you are precisely my cup of tea!"

Growling, Riley shoved his headphones on his ears, pulling up Spotify and tuning Bree's raucous laughter out.

**~0~**

"Hey, Biers. I need you to do me a favor."

It had been a couple of weeks since he and Jasper had lunch. The fact that the blond agent was still coming around shocked Riley to no end. Now it was the weekend and Jasper was calling.

"H... How did you get this number?" Riley asked.

The voice on the other end of the line snickered. "You work at the FBI, Biers. Come on, now. This isn't rocket science."

"Oh."

Jasper sighed. "Look, this is gonna sound strange. Are you doing anything right now?"

_**~0~** _

Riley pulled up in front of Jasper's building feeling more nervous than usual.

It still seemed surreal to him - how much time he got to spend with Jasper. He never expected to see the other man in a social setting. That they were becoming friends was a concept Riley couldn't quite wrap his head around.

It didn't help that all the contact he'd had with the blond agent, outside of work where he smiled more frequently, had done nothing to lessen his crush.

In fact, Riley was sure he'd been pushed headlong into full blown infatuation.

Jasper permeated his senses, his every idle thought. He found himself replaying the other man's words. Though he tried not to think about it, Riley couldn't help his longing. Did Jasper feel any measure of what he did? Whenever he was near, Riley couldn't help the giddiness that made his blood seem to bubble under his skin. Sometimes, it was all he could do not to giggle like a little girl out of pure happiness.

And holy God...

Riley's mind now held a slide show of Jasper's various expressions. He had favorites. Any time the blond man pursed his lips, Riley had to swallow a groan. Why was that so... Why did it conjure images and desires that he otherwise managed to keep at bay? When he did that, Riley was overcome with a want that bordered on need. He wanted to kiss Jasper so badly his limbs literally ached with restraint.

Time after time, day after day, Riley reminded himself that Jasper just wasn't on the same page as he was. That they were friends at all was an unlikely twist of fate. Hoping for something more than that was just childish.

So as Riley made his way to Jasper's door, he tried not to read too much into what he'd been asked here to do.

In a lot of ways, it was more nerve wracking than meeting the parents. Riley knew the importance of the name Alice Brandon. It was hard not to think about the significance that Jasper wanted Alice to meet him.

"Thanks for coming, man. I hope it wasn't too much of an inconvenience." Jasper greeted, shaking his hand. "This is embarrassing. I promised her I would make a new friend if she would. She's had trouble, you know, since..." He shook his head, and Riley waved his hand, indicating he understood. "But when I called her out because I didn't think her friend was real, she demanded to see proof that you exist."

Riley smiled gently. One of the things he loved about children was that they were so blunt. They didn't know how to play the games adults and older children did. "I think it's really sweet of you to do this for her," he said softly. As if he needed one more reason to admire Jasper.

Jasper seemed surprised. "I don't do anything for her. She's the one that insists on seeing me. Not that I mind." His smile held a hint of adoration. "She's a great kid. After everything she went through, if she wants someone to play checkers with, I'm going to be there."

The blond agent led the way through his apartment to a neat kitchen. Little Alice hopped up when the men entered and went right up to Riley.

"Are you Agent Biers?" she asked.

Smiling, Riley offered her his hand. "You can call me Riley."

Shaking his hand with a big grin, she tugged on him. "Come on. You can be the green marbles."

"You're usually green, Alice," Jasper reminded.

"I know, cuz green is the best! But you're supposed to be extra polite to guests, so Riley can be green," she said firmly.

Jasper chuckled. "Yes, ma'am."

Completely amused, Riley sat down. As they played, Alice asked him a litany of questions. She was a miniature, and much more adorable, Spanish Inquisition.

"Has you ever rescued little girls, like Jasper?"

Riley shook his head. "I'm not brave like Jasper," he said quietly. "I work with computers."

"You shouldn't downplay what you do, Biers," Jasper admonished. He turned toward Alice. "He helps the agents like me. A few weeks ago, there was a little boy who'd been kidnapped. Riley here was so clever, he figured out where to look for the boy just by listening to the sounds in the background of the tape they sent us."

"Oh, I see," Alice nodded, her eyes somewhat star struck. "You've got all the brave, and Riley has all the brains!"

Both men laughed. Riley stared down at the table feeling ridiculously pleased.

A little while later, Jasper excused himself to order a pizza while Alice and Riley set up another game.

"Are you Jasper's boyfriend?" Alice asked apropos of nothing.

Marbles went flying as Riley's hand jerked. He swallowed hard, automatically wondering what the protocol here was. Answering Alice's questions were one thing, but he knew from experience that parents were odd when it came to what their children knew about men who liked other men. "Um. We're friends who are boys," he said carefully.

The child rolled her eyes. "That's not what I mean," she said impatiently. "I asked Mommy if Jasper could be my boyfriend cuz then he would always be there, and I wouldn't have to worry about the bad people coming for me again," she explained. "But Mommy said that some boys like boys just like some girls like girls. She said Jasper likes boys, and I think you're a nice boy." She looked at him with a goofy grin. "Don't you think Jasper is sooooo handsome?"

"Well... I..."

"Ali, girl," Jasper's quiet voice interrupted them as he came back into the room. "Are you giving this poor guy a hard time?"

"No," she insisted. "I seen the way he makes eyes at you. It's like my Daddy looks at Mommy."

Riley bit down hard on the inside of his cheek. If he were anyone else he might know what to say, might know how to smoothly laugh it off. Instead he found himself frozen, hardly able to breathe as little Alice laid bare the things Riley was desperately trying to hide.

"Alice," Jasper tried again to stop her.

"He's so cute, Jasper! Don't you think so?" she pressed.

Jasper laughed, the sound a little nervous. "You don't call boys like him cute."

Riley tried not to feel as crushed as he was, digging his fingernails into the flesh of his palm.

"You call them... beautiful. Sexy, even."

At first, Riley was sure that he must be hearing things. His head snapped up, his eyes felt wide enough that he must have looked ridiculous - like a stress doll squeezed out in awkward, uneven bulges.

Jasper's answering laugh was silent. He winked at Riley and distracted Alice, asking her to help him pick up the dropped marbles.

**~0~**

"I hope I didn't embarrass you," Jasper said apologetically as he closed the door behind Alice and her mother.

"Embarrass? No," Riley muttered, finding he no longer knew how to look the other man in the eye. "Not by what you said."

They stood in silence, for once neither of them seemed to know what to do. "Kids, right?" Jasper said with a small laugh.

The corner of Riley's mouth quirked up, and he sighed. "The world is so much simpler in their eyes."

Riley heard a rustle as Jasper took a step toward him. He was startled to feel the blond man's hand on his arm. "I meant what I said, Riley." Jasper's tone was utterly sincere, but Riley was stuck on the way he'd said his name.

It was the first time Jasper addressed him by his first name, and God help him if he didn't like the sound of it.

"You're a good looking man, and smart and interesting to boot."

Struck dumb, Riley couldn't speak. His head still bowed, he looked up from under his eyelashes in time to see a curiously tortured look flit across Jasper's features.

"You don't want me, kid," Jasper said, his voice firm but a little sad. "You could do so much better than an asshole like me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you to barburella, twanza and jadedandboring. I hope you're all enjoying!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you so much to Naelany. She rec'ed my little story over at TwiSlash Unveiled. You should check them out!

Jasper cursed himself for not seeing it sooner.

Obviously, the fact that Riley was attracted to him was not lost on an eight year old girl.

"You're always so oblivious," Peter had laughed at him once as they left a club. "You never think anyone is flirting with you."

In retrospect, it  _was_  obvious. The way Riley got so tongue tied and twitterpated when he was around. How he would sometimes catch the other man staring. Jasper had chalked it up to Riley's lack of social grace when really, he was just bad at being subtle about his attraction.

"You, um... It's kind of you to let me down nicely," Riley had said, looking at the floor. "But you don't have to worry."

"Worry?" Jasper asked, resisting the urge to cup the other man's chin and tilt his head up.

Riley's smile was sad, and when he did look up, his eyes held a hint of defeated hurt in them. "I told you before, I've learned my lesson. Guys like me don't go after the class superstars."

Now, Jasper felt haunted. He'd meant what he said about Riley. He was sexy, smart, and apparently completely unaware of what he deserved. The latter bothered Jasper to no end, though he didn't know what - if anything - he was supposed to do about it.

Maybe... Maybe he could try to set him up with Peter.

The thought of contacting his ex made Jasper's stomach roil, but he couldn't deny that it would be a good match. Peter was an officer with the Houston Police Department, and it seemed like Riley was attracted to that kind of thing. Unlike Jasper, though, Peter was attentive. And Riley could be everything that Peter complained Jasper wasn't - loyal and dependable.

Jasper shook his head hard. Was he really thinking about meddling? Since when was he a matchmaker? He touched his hand to his chest, realizing with a start that there was an ache deep under his skin. He furrowed his eyebrows, suddenly finding his throat was tight.

He thought he was over Peter.

Jasper was jarred from his thoughts when a crumpled up piece of paper hit him square in the face and landed right in his cup of coffee. "Dammit!" He looked up, finding his partner was staring at him, shaking his head and guffawing.

"Jeez, Whitlock, I've been trying to get your attention for like five minutes," Emmett said when he'd finally settled down. He tossed a manila envelope on Jasper's desk. "Package for us, it seems. Security says it's clean."

Digging into his drawer, Jasper slipped on a pair of prophylactic gloves. Picking up the envelope, Jasper examined it out of habit. Sure enough, it had both his and Emmett's names on it, written in large, deliberate lettering with a thick, black marker. He hazarded a guess that perhaps someone was trying to avoid handwriting comparisons, making the letters more block-like than was typical for a casual hand.

Upending the envelope, Jasper shook the contents out onto his desk. When he saw the paper there, he froze.

Taped to a white page was a picture of him and Emmett from during what he was certain was the Newton investigation. Someone had poked holes through both their eyes. The words 'We're coming for you' were spelled out in magazine letter clippings below the picture.

Instantly, Jasper broke out in a cold sweat, and his body shuddered once. His heartbeat sped to an uncomfortable pace, leaving him feeling momentarily like he couldn't breathe.

"Ha. Nice. Those idiots," Emmett's booming voice coming from directly behind him startled Jasper, making him jump. Luckily, his partner didn't seem to notice, focused as he was on the photo. "I mean, for fuck's sake. Like we don't know it's them. Dumbasses."

Jasper swallowed hard, closing his eyes tightly for a brief moment. Panic and the discomfort of Emmett's large frame towering over him made it difficult to stay still in his seat. He wanted to run. His fingers were itching for the power of his gun in his hand. He struggled to stay in the present. "What, um... Who do you think it is?" he asked, hoping his voice sounded steady.

Emmett looked at him curiously. "The Scarpinato assholes, obviously. They don't know when to quit." He scoffed. "You remember how pissed off they were? Like they couldn't believe we had the audacity to arrest them for kidnapping a kid."

"Hmmm," Jasper muttered noncommittally, still staring at the photo.

He didn't notice his partner was staring at him until Emmett spoke again. "Are you okay, Whitlock? You're looking kinda...pasty."

Quickly, Jasper pushed back, standing up. He needed to get out of there. "I'm fine. Breakfast just didn't agree with me," he excused, putting the letter back in the envelope as carefully as he could with shaking fingers. "I'll take this down to the tech guys, see if they can analyze the picture. We need proof, after all."

He walked away before Emmett could protest or question him further. Luckily, he made it to the stairwell before his trembling limbs gave out. He slid down, his back against the wall, until his ass was on the floor and his legs were pulled up close to his chest. Shaking badly, Jasper rested his head on his knees, his breath coming in too-quick gasps.

"Get it together," he growled to himself through gritted teeth. Shoving his hands through the sleeves of his jacket as he wrapped his arms around his legs, Jasper dug his fingernails hard into his skin. The pain helped ground him, keeping him in the present so he didn't slip into a full blown panic attack. For long, long minutes, he shook and gasped, trying to calm his speeding heart.

Finally, the invisible stranglehold on his throat loosened, and Jasper felt like he could breathe again. A few more minutes passed before the shaking subsided. Carefully, he unwound himself from the tight ball he was in, letting his legs stretch out and his arms fall limply to his side. He rested his head against the wall, a bitter bark of laughter passing his lips.

"Pathetic," he muttered, hating feeling so weak and scared. It was especially maddening because he knew the Scarpinato twins were, as Emmett had said, idiots. They were petulant children throwing fits. These kinds of 'threats' weren't exactly new to any FBI Agent who worked on cases such as this. Angrily, Jasper wiped at the tears that had spilled over during his little episode with the back of his sleeve.

Pulling himself to his feet again, Jasper continued down the stairs. He felt quite a bit calmer and embarrassed despite the fact this time, no one had seen him freak out. Two levels down, he paused with his hand on the door, taking one more deep breath before he put on a carefully casual expression and walked through to the hallway.

Jasper's eyes darted back and forth self consciously as he walked, but no one seemed to treat him any differently. Most walked by without looking up, intent on whatever important business they were on. Those who did look up offered him the usual smiles and nods. He knew what they thought of him.

He wondered idly what they would have thought if they'd known the current golden boy of the Houston FBI had been crying in the stairwell only minutes before.

Blowing out a breath, Jasper hoped that it wouldn't be too much longer before one of his fellow agents did something actually heroic. All he'd done was survive the hell James and his cronies had put him through. He was a little sick of the admiring glances he still got and the smile he had to flash to keep up appearances.

Trying to shake off his feeling of discomfort, Jasper pushed open the door of the tech department.

"Hey, Whitlock," Bree greeted as he stepped in the door.

Her greeting got Riley's attention - for once he wasn't wearing headphones - and his head snapped up, his eyes widening as usual.

Jasper found himself smiling before he could help it. He'd never noticed before, but the other man's mouth was wide, his lower lip just slightly more full than the upper, and when he looked up in surprise, his lips parted just a little.

"Hey, Tanner," he greeted, though it was Riley's desk he strode to. "Got something for you guys," he said, throwing the envelope down. As soon as he wasn't holding the thing anymore, he slipped out of the gloves he'd been wearing since he opened the package.

Riley pulled out gloves of his own, slipping into professional mode. Jasper had to hold back a smile. After weeks of watching Riley stumble his way through conversation, it was somewhat amusing to see him looking so eager and confident.

When he shook out the contents of the package, Riley's eyebrows shot up and he glanced at Jasper briefly. He recovered quickly though and his eyes darted back to the picture. "All the usual stuff, right? Camera specs, day the picture was taken, distance it was taken from, etcetera?"

Jasper nodded. "You got it. And when you're done with the picture can you do me a favor and hand it over to the lab guys? I'm sure there aren't any fingerprints on it - they aren't  _that_ stupid - but you know we gotta try."

His eyes focused on the image, analyzing it by sight already, Riley just nodded distractedly. "I'll let you know."

~0~

Jasper tried to keep his mind focused on his tasks for the day, but he couldn't quite shake the feeling of anxiety. He stayed in for lunch, preferring the safety of the FBI building even though he didn't typically like what the cafeteria had to offer.

Mid-afternoon, just as he was going over Riley's preliminary report on the photo, his A.D. came charging into the bullpen, a serious expression on his face.

"Whitlock, McCarty. Come with me," he commanded, turning on his heel and striding away as quickly as he'd come.

Jasper and Emmett exchanged a short glance before they stood and darted after the A.D. who was already mid-sentence as they caught up. "...familiar with Edward Cullen?"

"The hotshot D.A.?" Emmett clarified. Edward Cullen was a name they heard frequently, seeing as he got so many death threats from the people he'd helped convict.

"Well, seems like someone finally got to him. His youngest son, also named Edward Cullen, 17, was taken today," the A.D. said gruffly, turning a corner. He came to a stop. "You're my S.A.C.'s on this. Cullen isn't here yet - he and his wife were traveling when it happened. You're going to meet right now with the elder son, Carlisle Cullen, and Junior's girlfriend, Isabella Swan, who was with him when he was taken."

~0~

It was approaching midnight when the A.D. ordered his agents to call it a night. "Go home. Get some sleep. I need you all at your best so we can help this kid. Tomorrow we're going to be right back at it early."

Jasper grimaced. He hated this part. He hated having to go home and rest when there was a boy who likely wasn't getting any sleep at all tonight.

Automatically, his mind conjured up what the boy, Edward, might be going through. These kinds of kidnappings were always the worst. If the team's suspicions were true, it was highly likely that the kidnappers were taking out their anger toward the elder Cullen on his young son.

He remembered James standing over him and a chill ran down his spine. How well he remembered waking, his hands bound painfully tightly behind his back, with his captor's malevolent glare staring back at him.

Pain quickly followed. So much pain.

Jasper shook his head hard, feeling his pulse get reedy. "G'dammit," he muttered under his breath. He cursed the fact that the day had started the way it had. If he hadn't gotten that g'damn picture, he wouldn't have been so on edge. He needed to focus. A kid's life hung in the balance, and he was going all wiggy for no good reason.

Stepping out into the parking garage, Jasper cursed, remembering he'd parked a few blocks away. This morning it had seemed like a good idea to take a walk after he got his coffee. Now, with the streets darkened and his sense of paranoia piqued, he wished he'd parked in the structure.

Again shaking his head at his ridiculousness, Jasper nodded at the other agents heading home and started in the direction of his car. He'd gotten just outside the structure when he heard the tell-tale echo of footsteps rapidly approaching. Quickly, he spun, catching his would-be attacker by the arm.

"Jesus Christ! Biers... what the hell did I tell you about sneaking up on an armed man?" he bellowed, furious at Riley for scaring him and himself for being scared. He threw the other man's arm down and leaned against the wall, digging his palms into his eyes.

"Sorry," Riley mumbled.

Jasper breathed in through his nose and out again before he straightened. "What the hell are you doing here, anyway?"

"I was... um." He shrugged. "I was waiting for you."

That definitely caught Jasper's attention. "What do you mean 'waiting'? Your shift was over at five."

Riley ruffled his hair self consciously, making it stick up in that endearing way. "I know...I just thought... I don't know, I thought you might want some company."

"Company for what?" Jasper asked warily.

Glancing at him, Riley huffed. "Look, I... I mean, I know the picture shook you up."

Jasper's eyebrows furrowed, his hackles rising defensively. "What do you mean? What did you see?"

Riley's eyes widened and he took a step back. "You just looked... off when you came to the office today," he explained quickly. "Like before."

"What the hell are you talking about, Biers?"

"Like that night at the bar," Riley clarified. "You know, after you heard that the Scarpinato twins were out?"

For long seconds, Jasper only glared at the other man, fighting the panicked urge to bang him up against the wall until he promised to never tell a soul. But Riley's expression was nothing but sincere concern; there was no judgment in his features at all. Jasper slumped, leaning back against the wall. "Fuck."

Riley tentatively reached out, brushing his arm with his fingers before pulling away with uncertainty. "It's okay. I mean... It's to be expected, right? After what you went through, I'd have been too scared to come back to work at all."

"I'm not scared," Jasper snapped roughly.

"I didn't say you were," Riley rushed, and Jasper saw his cheeks flush red. "I said, I would be. Anyway... I just thought... I mean, I thought maybe you could use some dinner or something?" He shuffled in place, addressing the next question to his feet. "I always cook too much for just me, and I can make something really quick, if you want."

Jasper's mouth dropped open as he tried to process what Riley was saying. "Are you... inviting me to your place?"

Riley's eyes snapped to his, wide as ever. "It's not for... I mean... I don't want to..." He snapped his mouth shut, closed his eyes, and tried again a moment later. "No ulterior motives. I just thought you might be hungry and could use the company?"

"It's midnight, Biers," Jasper said, amusement getting the better of him. This was truly a bizarre situation.

And Riley... well, he was something else.

"I know," the younger man said, looking sheepish. "I mean, if you want to go home and go to bed, I'm not gonna be insulted or anything..."

Despite the fact Jasper still felt cornered, ashamed, and defensive, his lips began to quirk up at the edges. Riley was utterly earnest about his intentions.

Jasper couldn't remember the last time anyone had even wanted to do something so kind for him.

And... it was true, the idea of returning to his home brought on a sense of trepidation that he would just as soon not deal with now.

Jasper laughed, the sound a little incredulous. "Okay, Biers, you crazy fuck. If you want to make me dinner, who am I to argue?"

~0~

"Jesus, kid, that was … phenomenal," Jasper said, leaning back against Riley's couch with a groan of contentment.

Sitting two cushions away, Riley smiled. "Thanks. I like cooking, but cooking for one is often pointless," he said wryly.

"Hmmm," Jasper hummed. He wouldn't know, really. Since Peter left, he'd existed on take out meals and drive-thru.

A comfortable silence slipped over the two men then, and Jasper tried to convince himself that he should be heading home. It was well past one in the morning, and they both needed to sleep, after all.

Not that he would.

Jasper swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat, his nervousness spiking as he thought about returning to his apartment. Alone.

"You know that blond in the bar that I tried to pick up?" he blurted, just to have an excuse to talk.

"Um, well... not personally," Riley hedged, obviously confused.

Jasper chuffed. "I didn't remember him either, personally I mean. I was pretty toasted that night." He sighed. "But seems he remembered me."

Riley raised his head off the back of the couch. "What do you mean?"

Staring at the ceiling, Jasper let himself recall the meeting with Carlisle Cullen. The man was going out of his mind with worry for his little brother, and yet, when they had a moment to speak alone, Carlisle had reminded him that they'd met briefly at the bar a number of weeks previous. "Apparently, he's the older son of D.A. Cullen," he muttered.

"No freakin' way," Riley said, his wide-eyed look of shock for once not directed at him.

Jasper snorted. "Did you just say 'freakin'?"

Riley could be depended on to flush. "Um, yes?" His nose scrunched as if he was deciding whether or not to be embarrassed. "Why?"

Stretching his arms wide before bringing them down across the back of the couch again, Jasper looked over at the other man. "I don't know... it's just... so... you."

"Oh," Riley said, looking down at his hands. "What does that mean?"

Jasper studied the other man intently and slid over to the middle couch cushion almost without conscious thought. This man perplexed him. He was so kind and gentle. Jasper had given him no reason to treat him so nicely - making dinner in the middle of the night just so he wouldn't have to be alone. While it made him feel uncomfortably vulnerable, it also pulled at the blond man's ill-used heart strings.

He raised his hands, hooking his fingers around the edge of Riley's glasses and pulling them slowly down off his nose. The younger man's eyes were as big as saucers, his breath stuttering out past his parted lips.

"You're just... cute," Jasper murmured, moving his hands to cup Riley's face.

Riley bit down on his lip, his voice breathy when he spoke. "Cute? I th-thought I wasn't cute."

Without his glasses on, Riley did look different. He was so pretty. Beautiful. Jasper stroked the pads of his thumbs over the other man's wide, full lips, tugging them loose of his teeth. "No. Cute is the wrong word," Jasper agreed, his voice low as he scooted a little closer. "You're..." Adorable. Charming. There were a hundred words he could have used, because Riley was definitely all those things, but he didn't want the younger man to be insulted. "Sweet," he decided finally. His eyes focused on Riley's lips. "Like sugar."

He heard Riley's little gasp as he leaned in, darting his tongue out to barely touch the younger man's lip. He sighed. "Yeah. Sugar," he murmured before leaning in all the way to kiss him properly.Jasper cursed himself for not seeing it sooner.

Obviously, the fact that Riley was attracted to him was not lost on an eight year old girl.

"You're always so oblivious," Peter had laughed at him once as they left a club. "You never think anyone is flirting with you."

In retrospect, it was obvious. The way Riley got so tongue tied and twitterpated when he was around. How he would sometimes catch the other man staring. Jasper had chalked it up to Riley's lack of social grace when really, he was just bad at being subtle about his attraction.

"You, um... It's kind of you to let me down nicely," Riley had said, looking at the floor. "But you don't have to worry."

"Worry?" Jasper asked, resisting the urge to cup the other man's chin and tilt his head up.

Riley's smile was sad, and when he did look up, his eyes held a hint of defeated hurt in them. "I told you before, I've learned my lesson. Guys like me don't go after the class superstars."

Now, Jasper felt haunted. He'd meant what he said about Riley. He was sexy, smart, and apparently completely unaware of what he deserved. The latter bothered Jasper to no end, though he didn't know what - if anything - he was supposed to do about it.

Maybe... Maybe he could try to set him up with Peter.

The thought of contacting his ex made Jasper's stomach roil, but he couldn't deny that it would be a good match. Peter was an officer with the Houston Police Department, and it seemed like Riley was attracted to that kind of thing. Unlike Jasper, though, Peter was attentive. And Riley could be everything that Peter complained Jasper wasn't - loyal and dependable.

Jasper shook his head hard. Was he really thinking about meddling? Since when was he a matchmaker? He touched his hand to his chest, realizing with a start that there was an ache deep under his skin. He furrowed his eyebrows, suddenly finding his throat was tight.

He thought he was over Peter.

Jasper was jarred from his thoughts when a crumpled up piece of paper hit him square in the face and landed right in his cup of coffee. "Dammit!" He looked up, finding his partner was staring at him, shaking his head and guffawing.

"Jeez, Whitlock, I've been trying to get your attention for like five minutes," Emmett said when he'd finally settled down. He tossed a manila envelope on Jasper's desk. "Package for us, it seems. Security says it's clean."

Digging into his drawer, Jasper slipped on a pair of prophylactic gloves. Picking up the envelope, Jasper examined it out of habit. Sure enough, it had both his and Emmett's names on it, written in large, deliberate lettering with a thick, black marker. He hazarded a guess that perhaps someone was trying to avoid handwriting comparisons, making the letters more block-like than was typical for a casual hand.

Upending the envelope, Jasper shook the contents out onto his desk. When he saw the paper there, he froze.

Taped to a white page was a picture of him and Emmett from during what he was certain was the Newton investigation. Someone had poked holes through both their eyes. The words 'We're coming for you' were spelled out in magazine letter clippings below the picture.

Instantly, Jasper broke out in a cold sweat, and his body shuddered once. His heartbeat sped to an uncomfortable pace, leaving him feeling momentarily like he couldn't breathe.

"Ha. Nice. Those idiots," Emmett's booming voice coming from directly behind him startled Jasper, making him jump. Luckily, his partner didn't seem to notice, focused as he was on the photo. "I mean, for fuck's sake. Like we don't know it's them. Dumbasses."

Jasper swallowed hard, closing his eyes tightly for a brief moment. Panic and the discomfort of Emmett's large frame towering over him made it difficult to stay still in his seat. He wanted to run. His fingers were itching for the power of his gun in his hand. He struggled to stay in the present. "What, um... Who do you think it is?" he asked, hoping his voice sounded steady.

Emmett looked at him curiously. "The Scarpinato assholes, obviously. They don't know when to quit." He scoffed. "You remember how pissed off they were? Like they couldn't believe we had the audacity to arrest them for kidnapping a kid."

"Hmmm," Jasper muttered noncommittally, still staring at the photo.

He didn't notice his partner was staring at him until Emmett spoke again. "Are you okay, Whitlock? You're looking kinda...pasty."

Quickly, Jasper pushed back, standing up. He needed to get out of there. "I'm fine. Breakfast just didn't agree with me," he excused, putting the letter back in the envelope as carefully as he could with shaking fingers. "I'll take this down to the tech guys, see if they can analyze the picture. We need proof, after all."

He walked away before Emmett could protest or question him further. Luckily, he made it to the stairwell before his trembling limbs gave out. He slid down, his back against the wall, until his ass was on the floor and his legs were pulled up close to his chest. Shaking badly, Jasper rested his head on his knees, his breath coming in too-quick gasps.

"Get it together," he growled to himself through gritted teeth. Shoving his hands through the sleeves of his jacket as he wrapped his arms around his legs, Jasper dug his fingernails hard into his skin. The pain helped ground him, keeping him in the present so he didn't slip into a full blown panic attack. For long, long minutes, he shook and gasped, trying to calm his speeding heart.

Finally, the invisible stranglehold on his throat loosened, and Jasper felt like he could breathe again. A few more minutes passed before the shaking subsided. Carefully, he unwound himself from the tight ball he was in, letting his legs stretch out and his arms fall limply to his side. He rested his head against the wall, a bitter bark of laughter passing his lips.

"Pathetic," he muttered, hating feeling so weak and scared. It was especially maddening because he knew the Scarpinato twins were, as Emmett had said, idiots. They were petulant children throwing fits. These kinds of 'threats' weren't exactly new to any FBI Agent who worked on cases such as this. Angrily, Jasper wiped at the tears that had spilled over during his little episode with the back of his sleeve.

Pulling himself to his feet again, Jasper continued down the stairs. He felt quite a bit calmer and embarrassed despite the fact this time, no one had seen him freak out. Two levels down, he paused with his hand on the door, taking one more deep breath before he put on a carefully casual expression and walked through to the hallway.

Jasper's eyes darted back and forth self consciously as he walked, but no one seemed to treat him any differently. Most walked by without looking up, intent on whatever important business they were on. Those who did look up offered him the usual smiles and nods. He knew what they thought of him.

He wondered idly what they would have thought if they'd known the current golden boy of the Houston FBI had been crying in the stairwell only minutes before.

Blowing out a breath, Jasper hoped that it wouldn't be too much longer before one of his fellow agents did something actually heroic. All he'd done was survive the hell James and his cronies had put him through. He was a little sick of the admiring glances he still got and the smile he had to flash to keep up appearances.

Trying to shake off his feeling of discomfort, Jasper pushed open the door of the tech department.

"Hey, Whitlock," Bree greeted as he stepped in the door.

Her greeting got Riley's attention - for once he wasn't wearing headphones - and his head snapped up, his eyes widening as usual.

Jasper found himself smiling before he could help it. He'd never noticed before, but the other man's mouth was wide, his lower lip just slightly more full than the upper, and when he looked up in surprise, his lips parted just a little.

"Hey, Tanner," he greeted, though it was Riley's desk he strode to. "Got something for you guys," he said, throwing the envelope down. As soon as he wasn't holding the thing anymore, he slipped out of the gloves he'd been wearing since he opened the package.

Riley pulled out gloves of his own, slipping into professional mode. Jasper had to hold back a smile. After weeks of watching Riley stumble his way through conversation, it was somewhat amusing to see him looking so eager and confident.

When he shook out the contents of the package, Riley's eyebrows shot up and he glanced at Jasper briefly. He recovered quickly though and his eyes darted back to the picture. "All the usual stuff, right? Camera specs, day the picture was taken, distance it was taken from, etcetera?"

Jasper nodded. "You got it. And when you're done with the picture can you do me a favor and hand it over to the lab guys? I'm sure there aren't any fingerprints on it - they aren't thatstupid - but you know we gotta try."

His eyes focused on the image, analyzing it by sight already, Riley just nodded distractedly. "I'll let you know."

~0~

Jasper tried to keep his mind focused on his tasks for the day, but he couldn't quite shake the feeling of anxiety. He stayed in for lunch, preferring the safety of the FBI building even though he didn't typically like what the cafeteria had to offer.

Mid-afternoon, just as he was going over Riley's preliminary report on the photo, his A.D. came charging into the bullpen, a serious expression on his face.

"Whitlock, McCarty. Come with me," he commanded, turning on his heel and striding away as quickly as he'd come.

Jasper and Emmett exchanged a short glance before they stood and darted after the A.D. who was already mid-sentence as they caught up. "...familiar with Edward Cullen?"

"The hotshot D.A.?" Emmett clarified. Edward Cullen was a name they heard frequently, seeing as he got so many death threats from the people he'd helped convict.

"Well, seems like someone finally got to him. His youngest son, also named Edward Cullen, 17, was taken today," the A.D. said gruffly, turning a corner. He came to a stop. "You're my S.A.C.'s on this. Cullen isn't here yet - he and his wife were traveling when it happened. You're going to meet right now with the elder son, Carlisle Cullen, and Junior's girlfriend, Isabella Swan, who was with him when he was taken."

~0~

It was approaching midnight when the A.D. ordered his agents to call it a night. "Go home. Get some sleep. I need you all at your best so we can help this kid. Tomorrow we're going to be right back at it early."

Jasper grimaced. He hated this part. He hated having to go home and rest when there was a boy who likely wasn't getting any sleep at all tonight.

Automatically, his mind conjured up what the boy, Edward, might be going through. These kinds of kidnappings were always the worst. If the team's suspicions were true, it was highly likely that the kidnappers were taking out their anger toward the elder Cullen on his young son.

He remembered James standing over him and a chill ran down his spine. How well he remembered waking, his hands bound painfully tightly behind his back, with his captor's malevolent glare staring back at him.

Pain quickly followed. So much pain.

Jasper shook his head hard, feeling his pulse get reedy. "G'dammit," he muttered under his breath. He cursed the fact that the day had started the way it had. If he hadn't gotten that g'damn picture, he wouldn't have been so on edge. He needed to focus. A kid's life hung in the balance, and he was going all wiggy for no good reason.

Stepping out into the parking garage, Jasper cursed, remembering he'd parked a few blocks away. This morning it had seemed like a good idea to take a walk after he got his coffee. Now, with the streets darkened and his sense of paranoia piqued, he wished he'd parked in the structure.

Again shaking his head at his ridiculousness, Jasper nodded at the other agents heading home and started in the direction of his car. He'd gotten just outside the structure when he heard the tell-tale echo of footsteps rapidly approaching. Quickly, he spun, catching his would-be attacker by the arm.

"Jesus Christ! Biers... what the hell did I tell you about sneaking up on an armed man?" he bellowed, furious at Riley for scaring him and himself for being scared. He threw the other man's arm down and leaned against the wall, digging his palms into his eyes.

"Sorry," Riley mumbled.

Jasper breathed in through his nose and out again before he straightened. "What the hell are you doing here, anyway?"

"I was... um." He shrugged. "I was waiting for you."

That definitely caught Jasper's attention. "What do you mean 'waiting'? Your shift was over at five."

Riley ruffled his hair self consciously, making it stick up in that endearing way. "I know...I just thought... I don't know, I thought you might want some company."

"Company for what?" Jasper asked warily.

Glancing at him, Riley huffed. "Look, I... I mean, I know the picture shook you up."

Jasper's eyebrows furrowed, his hackles rising defensively. "What do you mean? What did you see?"

Riley's eyes widened and he took a step back. "You just looked... off when you came to the office today," he explained quickly. "Like before."

"What the hell are you talking about, Biers?"

"Like that night at the bar," Riley clarified. "You know, after you heard that the Scarpinato twins were out?"

For long seconds, Jasper only glared at the other man, fighting the panicked urge to bang him up against the wall until he promised to never tell a soul. But Riley's expression was nothing but sincere concern; there was no judgment in his features at all. Jasper slumped, leaning back against the wall. "Fuck."

Riley tentatively reached out, brushing his arm with his fingers before pulling away with uncertainty. "It's okay. I mean... It's to be expected, right? After what you went through, I'd have been too scared to come back to work at all."

"I'm not scared," Jasper snapped roughly.

"I didn't say you were," Riley rushed, and Jasper saw his cheeks flush red. "I said, I would be. Anyway... I just thought... I mean, I thought maybe you could use some dinner or something?" He shuffled in place, addressing the next question to his feet. "I always cook too much for just me, and I can make something really quick, if you want."

Jasper's mouth dropped open as he tried to process what Riley was saying. "Are you... inviting me to your place?"

Riley's eyes snapped to his, wide as ever. "It's not for... I mean... I don't want to..." He snapped his mouth shut, closed his eyes, and tried again a moment later. "No ulterior motives. I just thought you might be hungry and could use the company?"

"It's midnight, Biers," Jasper said, amusement getting the better of him. This was truly a bizarre situation.

And Riley... well, he was something else.

"I know," the younger man said, looking sheepish. "I mean, if you want to go home and go to bed, I'm not gonna be insulted or anything..."

Despite the fact Jasper still felt cornered, ashamed, and defensive, his lips began to quirk up at the edges. Riley was utterly earnest about his intentions.

Jasper couldn't remember the last time anyone had even wanted to do something so kind for him.

And... it was true, the idea of returning to his home brought on a sense of trepidation that he would just as soon not deal with now.

Jasper laughed, the sound a little incredulous. "Okay, Biers, you crazy fuck. If you want to make me dinner, who am I to argue?"

~0~

"Jesus, kid, that was … phenomenal," Jasper said, leaning back against Riley's couch with a groan of contentment.

Sitting two cushions away, Riley smiled. "Thanks. I like cooking, but cooking for one is often pointless," he said wryly.

"Hmmm," Jasper hummed. He wouldn't know, really. Since Peter left, he'd existed on take out meals and drive-thru.

A comfortable silence slipped over the two men then, and Jasper tried to convince himself that he should be heading home. It was well past one in the morning, and they both needed to sleep, after all.

Not that he would.

Jasper swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat, his nervousness spiking as he thought about returning to his apartment. Alone.

"You know that blond in the bar that I tried to pick up?" he blurted, just to have an excuse to talk.

"Um, well... not personally," Riley hedged, obviously confused.

Jasper chuffed. "I didn't remember him either, personally I mean. I was pretty toasted that night." He sighed. "But seems he remembered me."

Riley raised his head off the back of the couch. "What do you mean?"

Staring at the ceiling, Jasper let himself recall the meeting with Carlisle Cullen. The man was going out of his mind with worry for his little brother, and yet, when they had a moment to speak alone, Carlisle had reminded him that they'd met briefly at the bar a number of weeks previous. "Apparently, he's the older son of D.A. Cullen," he muttered.

"No freakin' way," Riley said, his wide-eyed look of shock for once not directed at him.

Jasper snorted. "Did you just say 'freakin'?"

Riley could be depended on to flush. "Um, yes?" His nose scrunched as if he was deciding whether or not to be embarrassed. "Why?"

Stretching his arms wide before bringing them down across the back of the couch again, Jasper looked over at the other man. "I don't know... it's just... so... you."

"Oh," Riley said, looking down at his hands. "What does that mean?"

Jasper studied the other man intently and slid over to the middle couch cushion almost without conscious thought. This man perplexed him. He was so kind and gentle. Jasper had given him no reason to treat him so nicely - making dinner in the middle of the night just so he wouldn't have to be alone. While it made him feel uncomfortably vulnerable, it also pulled at the blond man's ill-used heart strings.

He raised his hands, hooking his fingers around the edge of Riley's glasses and pulling them slowly down off his nose. The younger man's eyes were as big as saucers, his breath stuttering out past his parted lips.

"You're just... cute," Jasper murmured, moving his hands to cup Riley's face.

Riley bit down on his lip, his voice breathy when he spoke. "Cute? I th-thought I wasn't cute."

Without his glasses on, Riley did look different. He was so pretty. Beautiful. Jasper stroked the pads of his thumbs over the other man's wide, full lips, tugging them loose of his teeth. "No. Cute is the wrong word," Jasper agreed, his voice low as he scooted a little closer. "You're..." Adorable. Charming. There were a hundred words he could have used, because Riley was definitely all those things, but he didn't want the younger man to be insulted. "Sweet," he decided finally. His eyes focused on Riley's lips. "Like sugar."

He heard Riley's little gasp as he leaned in, darting his tongue out to barely touch the younger man's lip. He sighed. "Yeah. Sugar," he murmured before leaning in all the way to kiss him properly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Heh. Yes, yes, yes. I know. My darling beta, jadedandboring, already yelled at me for ending it there. Don't worry. We're picking back up in Riley's PoV immediately next chapter.
> 
> Gee, I wonder what he's thinking...


	5. Chapter 5

After all the time he'd spent watching Jasper, Riley thought he had an understanding of the man.

It pleased him to no end, watching Jasper enjoy the meal he'd cooked. It made him feel smug and absolutely tickled as the blond man hummed in pleasure, licking his lips and closing his eyes as he ate. Of course, because he'd picked up on so much, Riley had an inkling of what Jasper would like, and cooked according to his taste. His efforts did not go unrewarded.

After dinner, Riley could have felt shy and ridiculous when Jasper laughed at his choice of words. Instead he'd only felt gratification, because he made Jasper smile even after his long, hard day. He understood that reaction, too. It wasn't as though the men and women of the Bureau weren't used to the word 'fuck'.

Where Riley got lost, astounded really, was why Jasper scooted closer. And when he did, Riley's body, already always aware of Jasper's nearness, came alive. A thrill went down Riley's spine as he found himself locked in the other man's stare. It was like waking from a falling dream already disoriented - breathless and surprised to find he was actually sitting still on the couch.

Then Jasper touched him, tugging his glasses down, and Riley was positive that he was asleep. He discreetly dug his fingernail into the side of his leg, blinking sporadically when he felt real pain.

How he ever responded to Jasper's claim that he was cute, Riley would never know. His heart pounded so hard it echoed in his ears. Jasper was cupping his face and looking at his lips. He looked, for all the world, like he wanted to kiss the younger man. To Riley, that just didn't compute.

So when Jasper's tongue touched his lips - so close that Riley felt enveloped by the heat his body exuded - the brown-haired man couldn't breathe at all. His mind felt bright white - blankness overwhelming concrete thought. This wouldn't happen in reality. Surely he was about to wake up, gasping and hard.

Except he didn't.

He didn't wake up when Jasper's lips closed on his, nor when the blond agent wrapped one arm around his back and threaded the other into his hair. Slowly, it began to dawn on Riley that if he was dreaming, he shouldn't want to wake up. Jasper's mouth moving on his made his knees weak and his pulse race. Hadn't he wanted this for so, so long?

Who gave a fuck if he thought it would never happen?

With a low moan, Riley gave in. He began to move his lips along with Jasper's, his tongue tasting the other man's mouth. If he was sweet, Jasper was savory, his flavor instantly becoming one of the best things Riley had ever tasted. He put his hands on Jasper's arms, feeling the way his muscles moved beneath his jacket.

Jasper broke their kiss, breathless as he held Riley slightly away. The younger man thought he saw indecision flash through his eyes before they darkened, and Jasper stood, bringing Riley with him.

"You taste so good," Jasper growled against his lips. Riley whimpered, instantly feeling his cock twitch at the other man's words. Jasper walked him backward, his hands unbuttoning Riley's jacket as he attacked him with increasingly harder kisses.

"Oh, God," Riley groaned as Jasper pushed the jacket off his shoulders and set to work on the buttons of his shirt. He rested his hands first on Jasper's chest then tugged his trembling fingers through his tie, loosening it and pulling it off. His fingers faltered as he watched the material fall to the floor.

_Is this really happening?_

Jasper's kiss brought him back to the moment, and Riley sighed, feeling the blond man's hands run down his chest.

Jasper was still kissing him as he shrugged out of his own jacket. He batted Riley's fumbling fingers out of the way, undoing the top button of his own shirt and pulling it over his head.

Automatically, Riley pulled away from Jasper's lips - wanting, needing, to see his exposed body. The instant he did, he froze, his eyes landing with vague horror on the blond agent's muscular chest.

For long moments, Riley couldn't breathe, looking at the collection of scars. Lash marks. Burn marks. The atrocities Jasper had suffered were forever seared onto his skin. Riley raised a hand, his fingers aching to touch the marks. Though he knew they didn't hurt anymore, he still wanted to soothe the other man's pain. He felt so helpless, hating that this man had been through so much.

Before Riley's fingers could touch his skin, Jasper's hand darted out. The slap of his fingers wrapping roughly around the younger man's wrist was loud in the room. Startled, Riley looked up, finding Jasper glaring at him with a hard expression that bordered on fury. He tried to take a step back, but the blond man held him fast. The atmosphere around them held all the heat it had a moment before but was now tinged around the edges with an air of danger. Riley's heart sped, and he felt fear - not of the man in front of him, but that he'd overstepped his bounds and hurt Jasper worse.

"Jasper, I-" Riley began, only to be cut off as Jasper silenced him with another, harder kiss. He moaned into the other man's mouth, gasping when he found himself pressed up against the wall. Jasper still held him by the wrist, his hands almost inflicting pain as he squeezed hard. But Riley could barely concentrate on that as the blond man had also eliminated the space between them, thrusting his body hard against him.

Whole minutes passed as Jasper kissed him. Riley was breathing hard through his nose - they both were. As their bodies writhed against each other, Riley's free hand grabbed at the skin at Jasper's waist while the blond man cupped his face. Finally, Jasper released his mouth, pressing a series of little nips up Riley's jawline to his ear. The younger man couldn't help the shiver that ran down his spine, with Jasper's breath hot and heavy against his ear.

"I want to fuck you, Agent Biers," Jasper rumbled, taking Riley's earlobe between his teeth and biting down, making him gasp. "Do you want me to fuck you?"

If it were possible, Riley's thoughts became even more muddled. His head was spinning. This was all going so fast. He gave a startled cry when Jasper suddenly spun him around so he was facing the wall. He whimpered with pleasure when the blond agent reached around, cupping him through his pants. "Isn't that what you've wanted all this time?" Jasper asked, rubbing between his legs with a firm touch. He licked the shell of Riley's ear. "Tell me you want me to fuck you."

"Y-yes. Yes," Riley panted. There wasn't a single thought in his head that didn't revolve around that want. For all he'd imagined, even in his most depraved fantasies, he could not have known how it would feel to have Jasper surrounding him. The thought of the blond man being inside him was almost enough to bring him to orgasm on its own. "Please." His voice was almost a whine, but Riley didn't have enough blood left in his head to feel shame.

Needing no more encouragement than that, Jasper's fingers made quick work of the button of his pants and shoved them down, quickly taking Riley's length in his hands. "You're so hard for me."

"Yes," Riley said again, seeming to have forgotten his language skills beyond that word. His already limited communication skills had dwindled to simple noise: a moan as Jasper worked his fingers over his cock; a whimper as Jasper bit the skin where his neck connected with his shoulder; a sharp intake of breath when the other agent pulled him back so his ass was sticking out.

Riley's eyes rolled up, his head tilting back when Jasper dropped to his knees behind him. The other man teased him first, biting each of his ass cheeks before he spread them and plunged his tongue into Riley's entrance. The younger man jumped. Every move Jasper made was a surprise to him, and his moans were wanton and wild. He shifted, spreading his legs and wondering again if this could really be happening.

Once he had him properly lubricated, Jasper stood again, pressing his chest against Riley's back. He kissed the side of cheek. "You're lucky I'm always prepared, Biers." The crinkle of a condom wrapper being torn was loud in Riley's ear.

Riley shivered, hoping the shamelessly wanton noise in the back of his throat was enough because he couldn't speak. It was all so overwhelming: the pressure he felt building in his core, the intensity of the pleasure he felt, and the man behind him, this man he'd admired and lusted after for so long.

All he could do was brace his hands against the wall, thrusting his ass back eagerly when he felt Jasper's tip at his entrance. Jasper took it down a notch, his movements not as frantic as they had been just a moment before. He slid into Riley inch by inch, his hands firm on his waist, giving the younger man time to adjust.

"You like this, Biers?" Jasper growled, his teeth scraping along Riley's shoulder.

Riley opened his mouth to answer but no sound came out. What he wanted to say was that the ache was exquisite. He wanted to say that Jasper's cock moving deeper inside him was so good, so fucking good. He wanted to articulate what Jasper's words were doing to him - making him so crazy with lust that Riley wasn't even sure that he could do anything but hold on tight and let the other man lead him wherever he pleased. Instead he settled on a high-pitched moan as he nodded vehemently.

"God, you feel so good. You're so fucking tight around me," Jasper murmured as he began to thrust inside Riley, his pace gradually picking up to that same frenetic pace that had driven this whole encounter from the beginning. If anything, the younger man's ecstasy was only increased at the thought Jasper was getting as much pleasure from this as he was. The blond man kept his hands tight on Riley's waist, occasionally kissing or nipping the skin of his back, shoulders, and neck as he moved.

Riley held on for dear life, his hands braced against the wall as Jasper drove into him. For long moments, there was only the sound of their combined moans and grunts, and the slap of their skin coming together quickly. It was rougher than Riley had ever experienced, and he wasn't entirely sure he should be enjoying it as much as he was.

But the pleasure was undeniable. The pressure that built in him was so overpowering it was very nearly frightening. When Jasper took his length in his hands, it was too much, and Riley felt his legs begin to tremble. Too many of his nerve endings were on full alert, sending shocks of electricity through his body. He came with a cry, his head resting against the wall and his hands in fists. Jasper wasn't all that far behind him, though he drowned his shout with his mouth open and wet on Riley's shoulder.

It took Riley several minutes to realize he wasn't the only one who was shaking. They were both still leaning against the wall - Riley pressed against it and Jasper resting on top of him. Riley could feel the other man's chest rise and fall against his back, his breath hot and shuddering near his ear.

After a moment, Jasper pulled back. With his hands at Riley's waist, he spun him around again, slower now.

Whatever Riley expected to see when he turned back to Jasper, he wasn't prepared for the blank expression on the other man's face. Jasper wasn't looking at him, but looking down. Riley's capability to think came back just in time for him to succumb to the qualms of uncertainty and insecurity.

Had he done something wrong?

Did Jasper already regret what had happened between them?

Should he have stopped it?

He opened his mouth but quickly shut it again when Jasper dropped to his knees. Riley felt terribly confused as the blond man began to untie his shoes one at a time, helping him slip out of the puddle of his pants and boxers. He ran his hands through Jasper's hair with uncertain fingers, not at all sure what was going on.

Jasper stood again, taking Riley's face in both his hands. His kiss was sweet and soft, and though he still felt baffled by the odd energy Jasper exuded, Riley melted into the kiss, his hands resting on Jasper's waist.

When he'd kicked off his own shoes and pants, Jasper took Riley's hand, threading their fingers together. It was such an intimate motion that Riley felt a lump form in his throat, and he struggled to swallow past it. His tongue was tied, and so he followed silently when Jasper tugged his hand, leading him down the hallway to his bedroom. He said nothing when Jasper pulled back the covers of the bed, taking his silent direction to lay down. He finally breathed out, a long sigh of relief, when Jasper climbed into bed behind him. He tried to turn, to roll so they were facing each other, but the blond man quickly wrapped his arms tight around Riley's waist.

Riley could hear Jasper's unsteady breath. Several times he swallowed hard, and Riley waited for him to speak, though he never did. Instead, he sighed and buried his head at the crook of Riley's neck, kissing the back of his shoulders once before his breathing evened out in sleep.

~0~

Riley woke slowly to the gray light of early morning. As the fog of sleep drifted away, he became aware of the various muscle aches throughout h is body.

It had been a long while since he had sex. He'd almost forgotten the dull pain, waking up after working so many ill-used muscles. There was residual pleasure as he remembered the way Jasper had moved inside him, and the memories left him feeling content and warm.

But he'd been warmer before, he realized suddenly. In fact, his skin had been super-heated and slick when he drifted to sleep, because Jasper's hot body had been pressed up against his.

Carefully, Riley rolled over, disappointed but not surprised to find the side of the bed Jasper had occupied empty and cold. He blinked, belatedly remembering that his glasses were probably still in the living room.

Wrapping a sheet around his shoulders, Riley put his hand on his nightstand, about to push himself up when his fingers encountered the familiar frames of his glasses. His lips quirked up, knowing Jasper had to have laid them there. He put them on and looked around, not really sure what he expected.

Maybe a note? Something. Anything.

Perhaps he'd stepped out to bring him breakfast in bed.

For a moment, Riley felt sad, and then he felt foolish. As if Jasper was going to leave him a little love note. Real life wasn't the stuff of romance movies, and Riley was more than aware of that fact. Resolved not to let his little girl daydreams overshadow everything that had happened the night before, he made for his shower. Reluctant as he was to wash Jasper off his skin, he was also going to be late for work if he didn't move fast.

That was probably it, anyway. Jasper had probably rushed off the moment he awoke. There was a boy in trouble, and he'd want to be in the office as soon as possible.

That thought, and finding light bruises on his hips from Jasper's fingers, and on his shoulder from his teeth, made Riley feel better.

~0~

Riley stopped short as he opened the door to the office and found Jasper already waiting for him. It was still early, so it was just the two of them there. A slow smile began to spread across his lips until Jasper turned and spoke.

"Jesus, where the fuck have you been?" Jasper demanded, but before Riley could speak, he shoved a USB drive in his hand. "Here. This is a copy of the communication we've received from Edward Cullen's kidnappers. I need you on this, Biers. We need something. Anything. We need to get to this kid now."

For one moment, Riley's thoughts were frozen, not sure how to respond, especially since, just seconds before, his every thought had been wrapped up in remembering Jasper's hands on him. Thankfully, his brain took over. There was work to be done, and Riley had no questions about that. He nodded once, taking the drive over to his computer, and getting right to business. "I'll let you know as soon as I do," he assured Jasper.

~0~

For eighteen hours straight, Riley analyzed everything he could about the four-minute video. He knew it inside and out - knew every background noise and every movement each of the three players made. These were professionals, unlike the Newton case a couple months before. The room they were in had been soundproofed so there was no noise of the outside world that could give away their whereabouts. The surroundings were barren, devoid of furnishings or decoration, giving no clue as to whether it could be a basement or a warehouse.

Edward Cullen's furious, frightened, green eyes haunted him. He was whole, though his cheek was bruised and the blood on the gag in his mouth suggested his lip was split. The boy's eyes followed someone off camera, so there had to be more people involved than the two people who stood in the camera frame with him - their bodies so covered that their voices were muffled and their figures indiscernible as male or female. Around the two-minute mark, he shouted something at the camera, but it was too muffled by the gag and too quickly cut off when one of his captors viciously kicked him in the side. Riley knew Edward's groan of pain would plague him until he found a way to help the teenager.

Throughout the day, Jasper would appear periodically. "Tell me you have something," he would ask, practically begging. Riley hated having to tell him no. He hated the way Jasper's eyes would narrow and his head would hang as he swore, "Dammit," in an oath under his breath.

It was past one in the morning when Jasper appeared again. "Go home, Agent Biers. We're calling it a night."

Riley wanted to protest, but he knew better. He had to admit he was exhausted. His head ached with the strain of trying to figure out a new way to look at the video - something else he could offer. With a sigh, he nodded at Jasper, fully expecting the other man to walk away.

He didn't, and as Riley gathered his things, he couldn't stop his thoughts from going right back to where they'd been that morning.

Both the men were silent as they walked toward the exit. A quick glance to the side showed that Jasper's expression was severe, deep in thought. Riley doubted he was even seeing what was in front of him, navigating by memory instead of paying attention to where he was going.

But when they reached the parking structure and Riley made a move to go to his car, Jasper's hand on his arm stopped him. When he looked again, the blond agent's expression now looked more self-conscious.

"Listen, Agent Biers," Jasper began. He looked around suddenly and pulled Riley a little further into the darkness, lowering his voice. "I just wanted to say I'm really very sorry for last night."

It felt as if Riley's heart had turned to stone in that moment, and it dropped down into his gut uncomfortably. "What?" he asked softly.

Jasper sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away. "I was... It shouldn't have happened." He took a deep breath, blowing it out in a huff. "You were right. The picture threw me off, and then the case... And I'll tell ya... I'm a little fucked up nervous about what Carlisle Cullen will or won't say about me, which I realize is stupid, but there you have it." He shook his head, and met Riley's eyes for the first time. "I just wanted to forget for a little bit... get it all off my mind. But I shouldn't have been like that with you. I shouldn't have used you like that. You don't deserve that shit."

Completely stunned, Riley couldn't respond. He stood there staring, his stomach churning around the cold rock of his heart.

"Anyway..." Jasper said, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "Look, when this is all over, when the kid is safe... if you're interested..."

Hope lifted Riley's spirit for a fraction of a moment before Jasper shattered it completely. "There's a guy," the blond agent said, not looking at him again. "He's... You'd like him. Maybe I could... arrange something."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you to barburella for prereading and the lovely, wonderful plummy for betaing!
> 
> Um.
> 
> Trust me...


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter is not the easiest. Tread carefully.

The second the words left his mouth, Jasper could tell it was the wrong thing to say. His heart wrenched and his gut twisted at the hurt expression that flitted across Riley's face. Inwardly, he cursed himself again for his actions the night before. He'd been desperate and depraved. He knew Riley was attracted to him, knew he wouldn't turn him down, and used him accordingly to forget his own fear.

Now he was going to have to live with the fact he'd hurt another man for whom he cared.

Wanting to believe he could salvage something of the situation, perhaps make two wrongs into a right, Jasper brought up Peter mostly out of nervousness. They were both good men, and he knew they would probably be good together. He wanted to offer some consolation because he felt so shitty for doing what he'd done. It seemed the least he could do to show that at the very least, he wasn't entirely heartless. He could take responsibility for his actions.

But looking at Riley's face, Jasper knew he'd made another mistake somewhere. He opened his mouth to apologize, but the younger man stopped him. "There's a guy..." he repeated, his voice unusually flat and dull.

Then, to Jasper's surprise, Riley's eyes turned absolutely livid. "You want to fucking set me up?" he asked, his voice uncharacteristically loud and strong.

He'd said fuck, not freak, and Jasper knew that was a bad sign.

Riley stared down at the ground, his hands in fists at his side. His eyebrows were furrowed in angry consternation, and his nose was flaring. When he looked up again, he was glaring. "I know how you must see me. 'Cute.' I get it. And probably a little stupid, too. But I'm not an idiot, and I'm not naive.

"I knew what was happening last night. It's not like you were professing your undying love for me or anything. You were in a bad place, you wanted to forget, and I was more than happy to help you." He chuffed, the sound harsh and bitter. "It's not like I'm a little boy being coerced. I could have stopped you. Maybe I even should have stopped you, but I didn't want to. I wanted it to happen."

There was a lot Jasper could have been concerned about right then. Riley wasn't shouting, but his voice was loud enough to carry through the bottom story of the parking structure. It would have been easy for someone to overhear them. But surprisingly enough, that thought only barely touched on his consciousness. He couldn't really think around the thick weight of shame that settled on his shoulders. He'd thought he couldn't be more ashamed than when he awoke this morning, still wrapped around this man who looked even more pure and innocent than usual as he slept.

But before he could swallow the lump in his throat and find his voice, Riley's shoulders slumped. He looked down again, wrapping his arms around his midsection in an obviously defensive motion. "I'm not so fucking pathetic that I need your help finding a man," he muttered. "I don't need your charity."

Jasper was dumbstruck, completely at a loss for what to say. He stood there, gaping like an idiot as Riley walked away. It took him a full fifteen seconds to get his feet to move, but he hadn't taken more than a step before a hard hand to his chest stopped him. He swung around, his hand automatically wrapping around the slender wrist that had assaulted him.

"Don't be more of a moron than you already are, Agent Whitlock," Bree said scathingly. "Leave him alone."

She glared at him, her eyes hard, and Jasper chose to honor her request. Bree ran after Riley herself.

Jasper growled as they disappeared from sight. He put his hands over his eyes, rubbing hard, not really knowing what he was feeling besides guilty. So guilty.

And exhausted. It had been a long time since Jasper had felt as weary as he was then.

No leads on the Cullen case, a man he cared for seriously hurt because of his stupidity... To say it had been a bad day was an understatement.

Somehow, though he felt so tired he could have collapsed right there and then, Jasper managed to get to his car. He drove home in a daze.

The fatigue that went straight to the marrow of his bones tempered any residual panic, clouding his thoughts to the point that he couldn't concentrate long enough to be paranoid. He fell into bed, asleep almost the moment his head hit the pillow.

~0~

Jasper woke to a now familiar weight settled like a rock over his chest. The light that filtered in through his windows was muted, so he knew it was likely just after dawn. He sat up, rubbing his eyes tiredly, trying to get a handle on the darkness that was threatening to consume him.

Drawing his legs up to his chest, he rested his head upon them. He rocked back and forth a little, attempting to understand what was going on inside his own head.

It was a strange, overwhelming feeling that weighed on his shoulders. He had the sense that something was wrong, off.

Something was not as it should be.

He ached. It was the loneliness he was used to but with a hellish twist.

When Peter left and he woke to a world where he was alone, without his peace of mind, the job he loved, or the man he loved, Jasper was angry. He was a good man who'd sought to do good things, and yet he'd lost everything. He was pissed off that Peter demanded more than he could give, he was furious and frustrated that what James and his friends had done haunted him to the point he couldn't do his job. He was bitter that instead of helping solve crimes, he was stuck analyzing his feelings and thoughts for months.

None of it seemed like his fault. He was a victim of fate. As maddening as it was, there was some solace in that. Now, though, the fault was his; there was no escaping that point.

What mystified Jasper was why it hurt so much. He understood why he felt guilty. Hadn't he decided after Peter that he was better off alone, away from men who wanted lives and families and things that Jasper didn't think he had time for? Yes, in a moment of weakness, he'd slipped with Riley, but he was only human. The guilt would fade. But this phantom pain?

He wasn't in love with Riley, so why did this recent episode hurt so much?

It took him days to realize he felt so sorry for himself. What he found with Riley was the hope of something more. It was nice, going home to a man who had his back and seemed to understand inherently what he needed. It was comfort and peace when his world was shaking.

Jasper realized he wanted the hope that there was a future out there for him, and a man he could share that future with. Whether or not it was Riley, he wouldn't even allow himself to consider.

Remembering Riley's sweet smiles, Jasper ached with want.

Morning after morning he woke like this, feeling alone and in need. Morning after morning he pushed the feeling away, putting on his suit and tie. They were his armor - the cool exterior he needed because there were people looking up to him, depending on him to make decisions and guide them.

What did it matter that he went home to an empty bed? There was a kid out there alone and terrified who needed his help. That's what mattered.

As Peter taught him - he couldn't have both. Someone had to be there for people like Edward Cullen. Someone had to fight for them.

He knew he wasn't going to stop. The loneliness was just something he hoped he would grow accustomed to sooner rather than later.

~0~

It was a Wednesday, a week after Edward had been snatched from the streets where he'd been walking with his girlfriend, not doing anything to harm anyone.

The long days without correspondence from the kidnappers had taken its toll on the family. D.A. Cullen, typically quite the imposing figure, stood with stooped shoulders, hunched inward protectively around his wife, Elizabeth. The woman was trying to put on a brave face, but her eyes were red from the constant attack of tears.

Jasper could tell that Carlisle was trying to be strong for his parents, but his own worry was etched onto his every feature. His girlfriend, Esme, rarely left his side, her hand always wrapped around his, holding him up. When she wasn't standing beside Carlisle, she had her arm draped around Bella's shoulders.

Bella Swan, Edward's diminutive, 17 year old girlfriend.

At first, Jasper had been annoyed when the teenager kept wrestling her way into meetings with the family. In his experience, teenage girls were often panicky, and the last thing anyone needed was a not-yet-woman screaming and causing chaos. Bella, however, had proven time and again that she was stoic. She was quiet, sitting in the back of the room with fierce eyes, never once allowing anyone to consider that Edward might be dead. She was just as terrified for Edward as the rest of them, frequently wiping away tears, but she didn't fall apart.

It was good, Jasper reflected, because when they found this kid, he would need someone strong to hold him up after what he'd been through.

They were all gathered because that morning, the D.A. had finally received an e-mail. It was from a free Gmail account, sent from a public computer that was accessible to anyone who paid for the time. The e-mail simply alerted them to the fact they'd be receiving a larger message.

The perp was toying with them, Jasper realized. He was giving them time to all be gathered in the same place. He wanted the D.A. and the police to see this.

The fact that they had Cullen's private e-mail was telling. It was more than likely they'd gotten that information from Edward. Whether or not so much time had passed because that was how long it took for them to extract the information, or if the long days without contact was just part of their game was yet to be known.

It was all a matter of waiting now.

Jasper was going over the list of names of the men and women D.A. Cullen had prosecuted for the thousandth time, trying to find connections that they might have missed, when a familiar voice caught his attention.

Across the room, Riley was talking with the A.D., their heads bent together over some report. Though he looked down quickly, Jasper felt an odd tug, his chest feeling suddenly tighter.

He still felt horrible, not only because of his stupid assumption and the way that he'd accidentally belittled Riley's emotional responsibility for himself, but because he hadn't apologized for his behavior. Jasper typically prided himself for being able to own up to his mistakes as well as his triumphs. Riley deserved that much, even if he didn't accept his apology.

Though it was tempting to blame the case - and he was horrendously busy, spending every moment he didn't absolutely need to be asleep considering the Cullen case from every angle - but Jasper had to acknowledge there was something else at work in his head. He almost felt like he couldn't face Riley.

Perhaps it was that he didn't want to recognize the ache that specifically belonged to the bespectacled man.

It was true that he wasn't in love with him, but he'd been... charmed.

Interested.

He still was, if he could admit the truth.

"Agent Whitlock, I think this is it."

Jasper turned to the D.A., quickly shaking away his wistful, wishful thoughts. "The same account?"

Edward, Sr. nodded, and Jasper sprang into action. "Okay, bring it up on the screen." He raised his voice. "Everyone pay attention. It's go time." He turned, putting on his gentlest expression as he looked on Elizabeth. "Ma'am? Maybe you'd like to get a cup of coffee from the cafeteria?" he suggested lightly.

Elizabeth looked white as a sheet. Out of the corner of his eye, Jasper saw Esme pull Carlisle close for a quick hug before she stepped over, her hand on Elizabeth's arm. "Come on. I'll walk with you," she said softly.

Still stiff with terror for her boy, Elizabeth nodded, letting Esme pull her away from her husband's arms. Esme put her arm around the older woman's waist and looked to Bella who sat with her legs drawn up to her chest at the back of the room. "Bella, dear? Why don't you come with us."

"I'm not going," Bella bit out between clenched teeth.

"Hon, it's better if you don't -" Jasper began placating, but Bella's fierce expression cut him off.

"If he has to suffer through whatever they're putting him through, then I can see it," she argued, her look clearly saying that nothing was going to move her from her seat.

Carlisle went to stand by her, putting his arm around her shoulder. "She'll be okay," he said firmly.

Jasper grimaced, not liking it. He didn't like that any of the family had to be there to see whatever it was they were about to see. The D.A. was an unfortunate necessity, as it was possible he could pick up on references the kidnappers made, but if Jasper had his way, the rest of them would not be here at all.

But they were wasting time.

"Biers," Emmett called, and Jasper turned to see that Riley almost followed Esme and Elizabeth out the door. "Why don't you stick around. You know if there's a video, it would just make it up to you anyway."

"Yes, Sir," Riley said, stepping back inside and taking up a position against the wall.

Turning his attention back to the large screen, Jasper indicated to the agent by the computer console that it was time to open the message.

When the image flashed onto the screen there was an audible reaction. Carlisle gasped. Bella gave an anguished cry before she clapped her hand over her mouth, and D.A. Cullen made a sorrowful noise at the back of his throat.

Edward was looking a lot worse for the wear than he had been in the first correspondence. His face was battered, one eye completely swollen shut. He was dirty and bloody, his cheeks noticeably gaunt where they hadn't been before. He wasn't bound anymore, though there were marks around his wrists where the rope had cut into his skin. It was no wonder, too. He seemed barely conscious. His captors couldn't have been worried he would escape in his condition.

He was alone on screen, huddled into a corner with his legs pulled up tight against him. His one good eye followed someone off camera, his look apprehensive. He flinched when someone threw something at him - a newspaper.

"Read it," a voice demanded.

For a moment, Edward hesitated, his eye flicking between the camera and the person speaking, looking like he wanted to tell him to fuck off. But then there was a flash of motion - someone kicking the boy sharply in the side. Edward sucked in a breath, groaning in pain.

"Read it!" the voice snarled again.

Edward's hands were trembling as he tried to grip the paper. He licked his lips and stuttered out a list of numbers. Sports scores, Jasper guessed. He knew one of the other agents on his team was already on it, checking.

They wanted to prove he was still alive, that this video was current. A positive, in Jasper's opinion.

One of the shadow figures stepped into the camera frame, grabbing Edward by the hair and dragging him to his knees.

Jasper felt an all too familiar tightening in his chest.

_Fuck._ _Please_ _not_ _now._

James had grabbed him much in the same fashion many times during the days he spent in captivity.

Jasper breathed in slowly through his nose, willing his speeding heart to slow. He forced his mind to loosen its grip on the pinpricks of panic that struck his lungs, making it difficult to breathe. Instead, he tried to concentrate if not on the video, then on the labored sound of D.A. Cullen's breathing close behind him, and Bella's soft weeping from the back of the room.

This kid needed him. He couldn't freak out. Not now.

On screen, one of the kidnappers had moved to stand behind Edward. To the kid's credit, though he must have been terrified he was trying not to show it. He was breathing hard, holding himself as straight and still as possible.

A strangely calm, almost melodic voice began to speak off camera.

"You see, D.A. Cullen, it's come to my attention, that you really have no idea what it's like to watch your friends... your family suffer."

The person standing behind Edward placed a well timed kick straight to the boy's back, sending him sprawling forward onto his hands and knees.

Jasper flinched, remembering James circling, circling, circling him before he kicked him to the ground, pinning him to the floor with his boot bearing down hard on his back. He shook his head sharply, ridding himself of the image.

The maddeningly calm voice continued to speak about the D.A. tearing families apart without caring what he was ripping them away from. They were brothers, sisters, daughters, sons, husbands, wives, mothers, fathers. Edward Cullen Sr. had brought so much suffering to so many people in the name of justice, the voice claimed. As he spoke, the kidnapper on camera punctuated each of his sentences by lashing out at Edward.

Though he tried to keep himself in the moment, as the video went on Jasper was having a harder and harder time pushing back his own memories.

James had made a similar speech, talking about all the men and women Jasper had helped put away. Those that had been hurt in the middle of his busts.

It turned out, James knew a good few of them. Knew what he'd done.

And Jasper had messed up his plan with the little Brandon girls. So much of James's life thrown away.

" _And_ _now_ _you_ _'_ _re_ _going_ _to_ _pay_ _for_ _that_ ," James had breathed into his ear right before he'd begun driving his fists into Jasper's chest.

On screen, Edward lay in a ball, his arms wrapped around his head, groaning and whimpering - just waiting for the next blow.

"Perhaps it's time, Mr. Cullen, that you reconsider your life," the calm voice suggested. "Before more of your family gets hurt."

The bundled figure on screen grabbed Edward, hauling him to his feet and shoving him hard against the wall. In a fraction of a second, there was a gun pressed against the boy's skull.

"No!" Bella screamed from the back of the room.

Jasper saw out of the corner of his eye when D.A. Cullen sank to his knees, his hand hard against his mouth.

But Jasper himself was frozen, remembering the cold steel of a gun digging into the skin of his temple so hard he feared his skull would crack.

_Not_ _again,_ _please._

"Get the fuck off me," Edward yelled, his voice frantic as he tried to push his captor away, but he was too feeble to do much good. "Get off me! Dad!" he cried.

And the screen went black.

There was a lot that Jasper needed to be doing. He should have been shouting orders at other agents, delegating duties so they were all working effectively to figure out where this poor kid was, or at the very least, he could be assuring Edward's panicking family that he was, in all likelihood, still alive. The voice had hinted but hadn't made a demand after all. But though those thoughts were all at the forefront of Jasper's mind, there was something bigger on his horizon, and he knew he had only seconds before it dragged him under.

He needed to not be in that room when it happened.

"Give me a minute," he bit out roughly to Emmett, turning on his heel and striding quickly from the room.

He managed to make it to the stairwell again before he lost it. He slid down the wall to the floor, his hands already tight in fists in his hair. He tried to taper down the little whines at the back of his throat, tried to keep himself tied to the present, to his work, to the teenage kid who desperately needed his help. Jasper was fine. Whole. No one was hurting him and the same could not be said for Edward.

But for all his logical mind knew he was safe, he felt anything but.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," he chanted under his breath. Flashes of memories hit him, like physical strikes that made his body jerk.

James was standing over him, drawing his foot back, about to kick him again.

James was laughing as he sat by the fire, rolling a poker in the flames as his partners ripped the shirt off Jasper's back, the terrible tearing sound loud in his ears.

"Jasper."

James dragging him to the edge of the stairs of the basement, snarling in his ear that he deserved this for all the things he'd done seconds before shoved him. The dizzying whistle of air past his ears as he fell. The pain of impact and then blackness.

"Jasper."

Jasper struck out blindly at the hands on his shoulders, frantic to get free. The hands were insistent; they kept coming back until they cupped his face. "Jasper! Open yours eyes. Look at me."

That voice. He didn't equate that voice to pain. He had to trust someone, as powerless as he felt. He opened his eyes.

"Stay with me," Riley said softly, stroking his cheeks. "You're safe, okay? Nothing's gonna happen to you here."

Jasper gasped, dragging in huge gulps of air, his shoulders rising and falling sharply. It took him a full minute before he could raise his trembling hands to cover Riley's on his cheek.

"Breathe in," Riley commanded gently. "Breathe out."

Listening to Riley's voice, Jasper found his calm again. As he came back to himself, he searched the other man's eyes, confused and humbled by his actions. "Biers..." he whispered brokenly. "Why are you doing this for me? I'm such an asshole."

"Because I'm not." As could be expected, Riley's answer was as plain as ever. He didn't move, staying on his knees in front of Jasper, just touching his cheeks with gentle motions, keeping him grounded. "And the Cullen kid needs you, so pull yourself together." His voice held no malice or judgment. Riley could always be counted upon to call things as he saw them.

"Right," Jasper huffed out on a breath, dropping his hands back onto his knees. Tilting his head back, he stared at the ceiling, trying to make his mind settle on one thought. Forget the regret coursing through him, the ache that Riley was just doing what he thought was his duty both as a good man and as an Agent. Anything that would help Edward... and he figured, as so many of the others did, that Jasper was the best man for the job.

Even if he was falling to pieces, apparently.

"Right," Jasper said again, nodding his head. It was time to put his game face on. He could help this kid. He knew he could. And he would prove to himself that he wasn't useless, that he wasn't irrevocably broken.

Riley kept his hands braced on Jasper's arms, supporting him as he stood. Only when he was sure Jasper was steady did he let go, stepping away.

"Listen, um..." Riley rubbed the back of his head nervously. Despite the situation, Jasper found himself bemused.

Just like that, the kind, shy, awkward man was back.

"I think... I really think you need to see someone, Jas... Agent Whitlock," he said, speaking quickly. "It's not a big deal, I mean, it doesn't make you …" He blew out a breath of air. "Look, I know this doctor. She's good. She'll do a consult over the phone and get you a prescription for anti-anxiety meds... something that can help you through the case." He raised his head, looking Jasper directly in the eye, his expression completely sincere. "But I think you should see her. I think she can help, you know, with this," he gestured around him.

Jasper's first instinct was to bristle. He wanted to deny he needed anything. Hadn't he been just fine on the Newton case? He didn't need mental help.

But how could he argue after Riley had seen him like that?

He did need something to get him through the case, something, however temporary, so he could breathe long enough to find this kid. Alive.

Bowing his head and placing his palm against his temple, Jasper nodded. "Yeah, Biers. I'd appreciate it if you gave me her number."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you to jfka06, jadedandboring and barburella. I'm gonna try to get this updated again very soon, but I can't promise as baburella is coming to visit! She's quite the distraction you know...
> 
> Soooooo...
> 
> How are we kids?


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Oh man! I'm so sorry for the delay in posting. The holidays tried to sap my mojo, and these boys … they REFUSED to talk to me. SMH. But I got a handle on them and this story now, so it shouldn't be too hard to wrap it up (that's what he said?). Thank you for your patience and I'm sorry for not replying to my reviews. I love you all and cherish your words.

When he got back to the control room, Jasper's AD grabbed him by the arm, hauling him right back outside. "You have something to tell me, Agent Whitlock?" he demanded.

"No, sir," Jasper said steadily, and as he said it, he knew it was true. Whatever had come over him had passed for the moment. In its place was the all too familiar adrenaline. Now that he'd shaken the panic loose, his brain was working a mile a minute, considering the contents of the video. Though he understood he'd brought it on himself, he was actually annoyed his boss was preventing him from doing his job.

The AD studied him but nodded. "You're lucky McCarty covered for you back there. Whitlock, if you're having trouble with this case -"

"No trouble, sir," Jasper interrupted quickly. "In fact, I have an idea where to start."

"That's what I want to hear." He pointed at Jasper's face. "I'm going to take you at your word because I need this damn kid found now. Get to work, Agent. But if there's a problem and you don't tell me -"

"I get the idea," Jasper said tightly. Without another word he turned back into the command room and started barking orders.

~0~

"Agent Whitlock?"

Jasper turned to find Carlisle Cullen behind him, his handsome features wrought with worry. Sighing inwardly, Jasper remembered when this man was just a hot guy at the bar who he thought might help him forget his worries for one night. "What is it, Carlisle?" he asked gently.

"I don't mean to bother but..." The other man hesitated, his eyes full of trepidation. "But, I would appreciate your honesty."

For a fraction of a second, Jasper felt panicked. Was Carlisle about to confront him about why he'd run out of the room?

He needn't have worried. Carlisle's only thoughts seemed to be reserved for his brother. "Tell me so I can be prepared to help my family... What are the odds Edward will come out of this alive?"

Jasper blinked, any number of platitudes coming to his mind. He could have told Carlisle that they were doing their best. He could have dodged the question by quoting statistics. But he knew Edward's odds the same as he'd known his own when he'd been under James's control. "They haven't made any demands, any sort of ransom," he began slowly, keeping his tone carefully soft and even. "This is both a good thing and a bad thing. It's good because it gives us time. Obviously, this man wants your father to suffer by watching his son suffer. He'll want to draw it out."

Carlisle shuddered, closing his eyes as a tear escaped one corner. "That's the bad news," he guessed, not asking.

"Yes," Jasper agreed gravely. "That and... yes, in all honesty, if we don't get to him on time, I don't think this man has any intention of letting your brother live through this."

His blood ran cold as he said the words, remembering when he'd come to the exact same conclusion about James's intentions for him. He remembered laying on a cold concrete floor, hardly able to move, his body was so battered, and thinking he would die there.

Jasper shook his head hard, and put his hand on Carlisle's shoulder. "I'm going to find your brother," he promised, though he knew he shouldn't have.

If Jasper got a second chance and this kid didn't...

Well, that just wasn't an option.

Carlisle nodded, the movement no more than a jerk of his head. His jaw was taut, like he was trying to keep control of himself.

Maybe honesty wasn't the best policy. "Listen, I was just telling my team that I think this guy isn't someone your father dealt with directly. It sounds as though he took your brother because he had to watch someone he loved suffer because of your father, so to speak. An eye for an eye. Maybe you could help your father think back. Were there any disgruntled parents, friends, family that gave him trouble or caused a stir when he got someone convicted?"

The other man chuffed. "Agent Whitlock, none of the family and friends of the people my father helped convict think their children or friend or... whatever should be locked up. He deals with people yelling at him and cursing him all the time."

"I understand," Jasper said patiently. "But we've heard this guy speak. Obviously his voice is distorted, but there can be clues in the cadence or word choice. Maybe a particular phrase that sticks out. Anything that can give us a clue where to look, even if it's just a guess."

Again, Carlisle nodded. "I'll talk to him," he promised.

~0~

It was close to the end of the day before Jasper had to give in and truly consider Riley's suggestion. The card the other man had handed him felt like a lead weight in his pocket all day long, and he disentangled himself from checking name after name off his list to find a quiet corner where he could think.

For whatever reason, this case was hitting him hard. It was as though he could feel everything Edward felt, and it threatened to send him back to that place where he was helpless, terrified, and trying desperately not to show it.

It made it difficult to concentrate.

Sighing, Jasper took out his phone and dialed the number on the card, eager to get this over with. He spoke to a receptionist who, surprisingly, put him right through to the therapist, an Irina Ivanonva.

"I thought you might be calling," Dr. Ivanonva explained. "Riley Biers called me this morning to ask for my advice."

That shocked Jasper right out of his irritation. "He did what?"

"He's the one who told you to call, is he not?"

"Well, yeah -"

"Why don't you tell me what's going on? As I understand, the matter is something of an emergency," Dr. Ivanova interrupted.

"Yes," Jasper agreed.

At first, he tried to just get at the pills - whatever it took to keep him calm until he could find this kid. The doctor was stubborn on that point. "I can get you a prescription, and it may help. It may not though. You need to be in contact with me, and I would recommend a longer course of therapy."

"I don't have that kind of time," Jasper said, frustrated. He'd already been away from the command room too long.

"Agent Whitlock, I understand that time is of the essence for what you do. That's why I'm going to make you an offer I don't make many of my patients. Actually, I don't make this offer for any of my patients." There was a long sigh on the other end of the line. "I will give you the prescriptions you need on one condition."

"What's that?" Jasper asked tightly.

"You call me. Every day until this is over. I don't care what time. During work hours, my receptionist knows to patch you through no matter what. After hours..." she sighed. "Well, I'll be sure my phone is on loud."

"Fine," Jasper agreed readily.

"I can't help you unless you're ready to help yourself," the doctor said warningly. "Don't waste both our time unless you're ready."

Jasper rocked back and forth slightly on the edge of the desk he was perched on. He hated this - that she was making him admit he needed help. It just wasn't something he could deny anymore. "I'm ready," he said finally.

**~0~**

Three days passed, unforgivable for the boy who languished in some unknown hellhole, but three days during which Jasper made a lot of progress, both personally and on the case. For three days Jasper worked without much difficulty. There was an undercurrent of anxiety that made his skin crawl, but the meds Irina had him on seemed to be enough to keep him in the present and his mind relatively clear of fear.

As promised, he found an hour to spare each night before he passed out to talk to Irina.

Irina didn't say much, but let him talk. At first, that fact made Jasper annoyed. Then he began to talk...and talk...and talk.

He hadn't known he had that much to say.

"Do you realize that this is about the thousandth time you've mentioned that it's a good thing Edward has such a strong support system?" Irina asked him on the third night.

"I'm close to finding him. I can feel it," Jasper said defensively.

"I'm not doubting that," she assured. "I just want you to realize that you're projecting."

"What?"

"You yourself have pointed out the similarities in your case and Edward's. That's why you have so much anxiety when you're working," Irina began. "You recognize that Edward will need the help of his family to recover from what he's been through. I wonder if it's that you didn't have the same support structure or you don't believe you need it."

Jasper paused, a little put out by that question. "I'm a grown man. He's a kid. I shouldn't need anyone to coddle me."

"We don't outgrow the need for a solid support system, Agent," Irina said firmly. "What you went through, what's being done to that poor boy, is nothing short of torture. Chuck Norris himself wouldn't be able to deal with what you've dealt with without having some issue."

"I've seen much worse done to completely innocent people," Jasper countered. "I'm an FBI Agent, for chrissakes."

"And many FBI Agents, whether they admit it or not, have sought therapy to deal with the things they've seen," she said calmly. "That aside, I could theorize that because you are an FBI Agent, because you have special training and experience, it would be _especially_ jarring to find yourself in a situation where you're made to be completely helpless."

Jasper flinched at the last word, his hands automatically balling into fists. He was glad that woman couldn't see him. "I wasn't -"

"You were," she interrupted insistently. "What those people did to your mind can, in many ways, be worse than what they did to your body. Be open with me. I know this is difficult, but how did you feel when you were under their thumb?"

"Pissed off," he growled. That much was true. He'd never felt fury like that - so insanely intense and yet utterly impotent.

"And?" the doctor prompted.

Jasper knew what she wanted. He'd been through this already with the original therapists. Irina had already called him on it several times - that he was just picking up cues, telling her what she wanted to hear. But not telling the truth about what he'd felt was not going to help him recover, long term. He might be able to pass a psych test and get his badge back, but what good was that when his life continued to fall apart?

Blowing out a long, frustrated breath, Jasper reached back into the memories he'd been avoiding for well over a year now.

Snippets and images came back to him. When he was at his full strength, he'd had his arms tied behind his back so he couldn't beat the snide grin right off James's face. He couldn't throw off Victoria or their other cohort who held him still so James could burn him or cut him or do whatever it was struck his fancy just then.

After a while his strength ebbed, taking most of his fury with it. It was hard then, not to tremble when James stood over him. The terror he felt, the absolute desperation to get away from that man and that place, Jasper didn't have a name for.

"I was powerless," he said in a whisper, accepting that fact as the words came out of his mouth. "And scared. I was sure I was going to die, and there was nothing I could do to stop it."

His hands were shaking, but he didn't realize it until the phone dropped from his hand. Pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes, Jasper tried to quash the tears that threatened, but he couldn't. Glad he was in the quiet of his own apartment, alone, he bent forward, wrapping his arms around himself as he wept miserable tears.

It was several minutes before he calmed himself enough to remember he'd been talking to the doctor, and he found his phone again. "I'm sorry. I don't know what happened."

"This is therapy, Jasper," Irina said gently. "You don't have to apologize for your feelings. Don't try to shut them away.

"What you do want to realize though is that there are people in your life you can trust with this. Well, that's my assumption anyway. Surely you have friends or family you can turn to?" Irina asked.

She'd asked before and Jasper had neatly dodged the question. He was silent then, remembering Alice asking him if he had any friends besides her.

"You have to trust someone," Irina continued, filling in the silence. "Think about it, Jasper. Everyone has a safe harbor, but it is up to you to reach for it."

~0~

For a long time, after he hung up the phone with Irina, Jasper lay in his bed, trying to grasp what few hours of sleep he allowed himself. It was no use. Irina's words had awakened something inside of him, something he'd tried so hard to beat down and shove to the darkest corner of the basement of his mind. Deep - where he could forget about it forever.

No such luck.

Driving his fist into a pillow, Jasper growled out his frustration into the quiet house. Therapy was supposed to help, wasn't it? He was more jittery now, irrationally frightened at the random noises of his quiet neighborhood, than he had been before. What good was therapy if it was going to cripple him?

On top of the trepidation that kept him too alert, Irina had managed to dredge up other memories.

She sounded a lot like Peter.

"You don't understand," he remembered yelling at Peter not too long after he'd come home. He'd awaken from a horrible nightmare and thrown Peter to the ground as the other man tried to calm him.

"I'm trying to understand. But I can't help you if you don't talk to me," Peter had practically begged.

Jasper very vividly remembered turning away from him, folding his arms over his head as he laid on the very edge of his side of the bed. "Why can't you let it go?"

"Because I love you," Peter countered. "I love you, and I want to understand. I want to help you." He'd sighed and Jasper flinched when he felt Peter's hand against his back. "Babe, I want you to feel safe with me." He'd stroked his fingers along Jasper's spine, his voice gentle. "It doesn't mean you're not strong, you know. If you lean on me a little, it doesn't make you weak. It's what I'm here for. It's what I want to be here for."

Jasper shook away the memory, trying to breathe around the heavy ache at the center of his chest.

He wanted to stand on his own two feet. He wanted to be able to say that he didn't need anyone but... God, he did long for someone.

Peter to an extent but those wounds had healed over to a large degree. They'd had their time, and Jasper had completely shot it to hell.

It was strange to think about the safety of another person's arms and have his thoughts immediately stray to a waif of a man. Still, when Jasper thought about Riley, he couldn't deny that imagining he was here made him breathe just a little bit easier.

There was something to Irina's words about trust. Physically, Jasper could take care of himself, though in that one extreme case, he'd been unable to do so. Safety was a state of mind, and he felt like he could trust Riley to see him like this without making him feel weaker.

Riley still thought he was the hero, despite having seen him at a low point.

More than that, Jasper found he wanted him there.

Almost without thinking, he reached for his phone and was dialing before he could talk himself out of it.

"Hello?" Riley's groggy voice answered, and already Jasper felt less anxious.

"Biers? Uh. Riley..."

"Jas... Agent Whitlock?" Riley answered, sounding surprised and a little more awake.

Jasper blew out a breath. "Listen, I know it's late. Early. Whatever. And I know this is rude as hell, and after everything I did, I don't have a right..."

"Do you want me to come over? Or you come over here?" Riley supplied when Jasper couldn't find the words. "I can. Or you can. Whatever."

It was such a kind response that Jasper wanted to weep. Again. He sighed. "Yeah," he said, sounding tired even to his own ears. "Yeah, I'd really... I think I need that. I need... you."

They were the hardest words he'd ever said.

But also the truest.

For a second, there was only the sound of their breathing.

"Okay. I'll be there," Riley finally spoke, and Jasper could hear the shuffle of him getting out of bed, putting clothes on. "Just tell me where there is."

"Thank you," Jasper said, releasing the breath he didn't know he'd been holding.

**~0~**

The next morning, Jasper's step felt unmistakably lighter as he made his way to the command room. He was anxious to get back to the case, and his mind was full to the brim with new ideas and possibilities.

Present but ignored for the time being - there was getting this boy home safely to consider, after all - was a warmth that had kindled in the space his cold, hard heart had occupied.

It couldn't have been very comfortable for Riley the night before. Jasper was uncomfortable with having been so selfish, so needy to call the other man in the middle of the night. But if he felt put out or annoyed, Riley didn't show it. Instead, he'd taken Jasper's hand - blushing scarlet as he did - and asked where the bed was. They'd laid down together, the younger man tentatively brushing the hair away from Jasper's face before laying his hand lightly against his hip.

Struck by the other man's tenderness, Jasper didn't have the words to tell Riley how much he appreciated what he was doing. He showed it the only way he knew how - with a soft, chaste kiss before he fell asleep.

"Hey, Whitlock!"

As he entered the command room, Jasper put the emotion that belonged now to Riley on a shelf. He would examine it later - when the boy was safe again.

"Report, McCarty," he commanded his partner.

"That idea you had was genius, man," Emmett said, thrusting a folder into his hand. "Concentrate on the people Cullen has put away that maybe haven't handled prison that well? Most of it was a dead end, but we found this maybe twenty minutes ago."

Jasper quickly scanned through the folder. "Demetri Volturi? This guy's dead."

"Right. Exactly. From the report, it looks like he had a hard time behind bars. Tender soul, he was," Emmett said with a grunt. "He was hospitalized a number of times after being beaten and/or raped by other inmates. He suffered. A lot."

Despite knowing the types of atrocities this Volturi guy was capable of, Jasper couldn't help but grimace. He wouldn't wish that type of torture even on the likes of James. "You're thinking someone wants revenge for him? That would definitely fit."

"Not only that, but this guy was surrounded by shady types. You remember the Scarpinato twins?"

"Of course," Jasper said with a grimace. After their idiotic threats, they'd been arrested again.

"Well, their father - the one with the deep pockets - is uncle to Felix Bartolini."

"And Felix Bartolini is?"

Emmett tapped Demetri's picture. "Was this guy's boyfriend. His very nasty, very pissed off boyfriend."

"Fuck me," Jasper said under his breath. "The Scarpinato twins... tell me that D.A. Cullen is the one on their case."

"He is indeed," Emmett confirmed. "Of course, we checked into them and Daddy Warbucks before. They came back clean."

"But he could be funding Bartolini's cause," Jasper finished. "Yes! This is exactly what we need. McCarty, get D.A. Cullen in here. Mallory!" he barked at one of the other agents.

"Sir?"

"Get whatever recordings we have on Felix Bartolini and..." he snapped his fingers, trying to recall the Scarpinato twins' father's name, "Aro Scarpinato. We're going to need to do a speech comparison. Crowley?"

"Yes, sir?"

"I need a list of Aro Scarpinato's assets - homes and businesses he might own. Property. That kind of thing. Also Felix Bartolini's." He clapped his hands together. "Let's move, people!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: SIGH! So... my lovely girl, jadedandboring, WHO SHOULD BE RESTING, GDAMMIT, went ahead and beta'd this for us. I love her.
> 
> Much love to twilightmundi who had volunteered to help beta, jfka06 and barburella for prereading and cheering me along.
> 
> One more chapter, I believe.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Again, I must apologize about review replies. I adore each and every one of you who stops to comment. I love these boys, and I'm glad you're enjoying them too.

The day after his potential breakthrough on the case, Jasper ran into Riley as he was heading up to the command room.

"Agent Biers," he called, jogging to catch the other man before he reached the elevator.

Riley turned, his eyes looking surprised and perplexed behind his glasses.

Casting a surreptitious glance around to be sure that no one was in hearing distance, Jasper leaned in, dropping his voice. "I don't think I got a chance to thank you the other night for introducing me to Dr. Ivanonva ."

"She's fantastic, but I can't take the credit," Riley said quietly, looking down at his shoes. "Actually, she pressed me about it. She said if you needed to talk to someone..." he trailed off as if abruptly realizing what he'd said. His eyes darted guiltily to Jasper's.

Jasper blinked, trying to figure if he'd heard right. "What...are you trying to say she knew me? Before, I mean?"

Riley sighed. "It's not a big deal, okay?" he said nervously. "It's like... a huge coincidence. I see her for... other things, and your n-name might have come up." He stopped, his cheeks beet red, and huffed, shaking his head. "Anyway, the long and short of it is … Irina... Dr. Ivanova was Laurent Marcus's girlfriend at the time he...you... Yeah."

Instantly, Jasper broke out in a cold sweat feeling the chill of the air on his skin. He felt suddenly winded, not knowing what he was supposed to be feeling other than shock. He was very glad that he had no idea what this woman looked like or else his mind would have been plagued with images of her wrapped around Laurent, grinning at him maliciously, getting off at the the sight and sound of his pain.

"Maybe I shouldn't have told you that," Riley muttered looking at him worriedly. "She just... I mean, she's a really good person. She didn't know, didn't realize... what he was capable of."

Jittery, Jasper quickly stepped into a side hallway that offered a little more privacy. Drawing a yellow prescription bottle from his jacket pocket, he tried to get his trembling fingers to work long enough to open the damn thing but couldn't. "Dammit," he muttered. "I understand the point of child safety, but making anti-anxiety meds this hard to open seems counter intuitive."

Stepping to his side, Riley took the pill bottle from him and opened it. Jasper shook out two pills, tilting his head back as he swallowed them dry and rested against the wall, trying to find his calm again.

As he breathed in and out slowly, Riley stroked his arm. The other man's touch was soothing, and Jasper only barely resisted the urge to reach out and twine their fingers together. This side hallway did not offer even the semi-privacy of the stairwell, after all.

"I'm really sorry," Riley murmured, sounding miserably contrite. "That was a stupid thing to do."

"It's fine," Jasper said, blowing out a long, slow breath. "It makes sense, even. Small fucking world, I guess."

"Yeah," Riley agreed. "Well, I -" He rubbed the back of his head, looking sheepish. "It wasn't that big of a coincidence. She was here, you know, after that whole thing went down."

Jasper flinched, remembering the long hospital stay after his ordeal. It had been a small relief that James and his crew had been killed in the the shoot-out that ensued during his rescue. Procedure, though, dictated a thorough investigation afterward that would have included talking to people close to the three perps.

Like girlfriends.

"I um... Well, she was saying stupid things, about you and about us, and I shouldn't have butted in at all, but I was pissed off. We all were," Riley explained, and Jasper understood what he was saying. Nothing pissed off a cop more than crimes committed against a fellow officer.

"What did you do?" Jasper asked, curious now.

Riley grimaced. "I might have followed her out to the parking lot and detailed what a piece of shit her boyfriend was, and what he was capable of. Things I shouldn't have told her at all," he admitted, sounding ashamed.

"Jesus," Jasper muttered, rubbing his eyes.

"I mean, it all worked out," Riley said quickly. "She uh... she broke down. And she said she was a psychologist; she should have seen the signs. I ended up comforting her."

Jasper snorted. "That doesn't surprise me at all, Biers." He sighed, feeling quite a bit calmer. "I just don't think you can help yourself."

"Well," Riley dismissed, shifting his weight. He sounded vaguely pleased by Jasper's semi-compliment. "I told her I was thinking of seeing someone, you know, for um... therapy."

At that Jasper had to laugh. He opened his eyes, turning toward Riley with amusement. "Biers, are you saying you bitched the woman out and then asked for her professional help?"

"Well... yeah."

"You're... " Jasper almost said cute but remembered the way Riley had spat that word several nights before. His grin fell. "You're definitely a unique character," he amended. Then he scrunched his nose as a thought occurred to him. "You talk about me in therapy?"

"Oh. Um. I mean, your name has come up before, but so have a lot of people..."

"Like... in a bad way?" Jasper asked, surprised by how much that thought made his heart ache. He shook his head. "You know what? It's none of my business. Anyway. Thank you for helping me. Again. I have to get back on the case." He touched Riley's arm briefly before striding back out toward the main hallway and the command room.

~0~

"Aro Scrapinato!"

Jasper turned to find D.A. Cullen standing in the doorway of the command room, a slightly maniacal look on his face. He stood, going to the man. "Sir?"

"Aro Scarpinato," Cullen said again. He shoved a USB drive in Jasper's hand. "This is a copy of the message I received about twenty minutes ago. I know, I'm sorry," he said quickly before Jasper could get a word in edgewise. "I know I should have waited to view it, but they sent it without warning this time, and..." He took a deep breath. "Agent Whitlock, I needed to know if my son was still alive."

"Fine," Jasper said tightly, trying to keep patience in his tone. He handed the drive to Emmett and turned back to the D.A. "What about Aro Scarpinato?"

"The man on the video... he said facade," the other man explained, mispronouncing the word as fah-kayde. "I remember speaking to the man. He was very eloquent, so it stood out when he mispronounced that word."

Nodding, Jasper patted the man's arm and stepped to Emmett's side. "No one fed him that name, right?" he asked in a tone low enough that the D.A. couldn't hear him.

Emmett shook his head. "No. We didn't mention anyone specifically when we talked to him about thinking of friends or relatives of people who might hold a grudge."

"Agents?" Cullen called, his voice sounding raw. "That video... please. You have to get to my son now."

"Aro Scarpinato was already on our short list," Jasper assured. In fact, just before the D.A. had busted in, they had been going over the official report comparing a short video of Scarpinato with the voice that spoke on Edward's video. It was enough of a match for a search warrant. They had to be careful, though. If the men who had Edward knew they were encroaching, things could go very wrong, very quickly.

"We've got agents out looking into his properties," Emmett continued. "As soon as we can move without endangering Edward's life further, we will."

~0~

They'd found the property, Jasper was sure of it.

The house looked fairly empty. Just a few minutes before they'd seen Felix Bartolini exit with a number of others, most of them sticky characters.

Jasper was conferring with his team. "Stanley, you're leading B team to search the upstairs. I'll be heading up A team on the downstairs level. Keep alert. It looks like they've all gone, but you never know."

When everyone was ready to go, Jasper closed his eyes briefly, offering up a prayer to whomever might be listening that this was the right move, and they weren't about to get a boy killed.

Moving silently, officers converged on the house from the front and rear. A knock to the door went unanswered, and they forced their way inside, still moving stealthily.

When both entries were clear, Jasper signaled to B team to take the top floor and his team to cover the first. As they moved silently through the house, Jasper stepped quietly through the kitchen, his gun steady in front of him.

"McCarty," he hissed, nodding with his chin at a door with a padlock.

Emmett nodded once, moving to the side of the door. He nodded again as Jasper took the opposite side and leaned over, examining the lock. He smirked when he realized it was open. Either they'd just gotten very lucky or there was a nasty surprise waiting for them.

Jasper pushed open the door and pointed his weapon as Emmett entered first.

"Clear," Emmett whispered, and they descended the steps carefully.

All they found in the basement was a terrified, badly beaten teenager with his hands bound together behind his back. Emmett immediately dropped to his knees beside the boy.

"We got him," Jasper said into his walkie. "I need the EMTs down here."

No sooner had the words left his mouth than there was a commotion upstairs. Gunfire.

"We can't stay down here. We're sitting ducks," Emmett muttered.

"Kid. Edward," Jasper said, stooping to figure the extent of the boy's injuries. His arm was definitely broken, and he was covered in bruises and contusions, but his eye - the one that wasn't swollen shut - was focused and alert. "Look at me, okay? Just keep your cool. We're gonna get you out of here."

Edward, looking around nervously with his one good eye only nodded, licking his cracked lips so he could speak. "I can walk," he protested when Emmett tried to lift him.

"We need to run faster than you can hobble," Emmett insisted, lifting him anyway. "I know it sucks, but it's important that you do exactly what we say." He grimaced as the gunfire continued upstairs.

"Keep your head down no matter what," Jasper directed, already on the stairs, his gun pointed toward the open doorway. "Let's move."

"Agent down. We have an agent down!" a voice called from the walkie. "Crowley!"

"Fuck," Jasper muttered, he pressed the button. "McCarty and I are coming out with the boy." He darted quickly up the stairs. The kitchen was clear. "McCarty, move," he directed, covering Emmett's retreat.

_**~0~** _

The shoot out upstairs ended with the deaths of Renata and Corin Afton, siblings vaguely related to the Bartolini family. Agent Tyler Crowley was shot through the leg and Agent Jessica Stanley was brought to the hospital to double check the severe bruising left on her chest after her bullet proof vest caught a bullet that would have pierced her heart.

Leaving Emmett in charge of the crime scene, Jasper followed his injured agents to the hospital.

Once he was assured they were fine, Jasper headed up to Edward's room.

The kid's room - one of the hospital's largest suites, of course - was crowded, and already brimming with flowers and balloons. He looked like he was asleep, his good hand clasped tightly around Bella. His mother sat on his other side, eyes still shining with tears. Also in the room were his father, his brother, and Esme.

Seeing him, both Carlisle and the D.A. stood, coming out to meet him in the hallway.

"Agent Whitlock. I don't know how I could ever thank you enough," Cullen said, his voice shaking with emotion.

Jasper shook his head, acknowledging the sentiment though he didn't think he'd done anything but his job. "How is he?"

It was Carlisle who answered, blowing out a long breath. "His main problem right now is that he's malnourished. He has a number of cracked ribs, but thankfully, somewhat miraculously, there were no greater complications from that. His arm is fractured, and he's got more cuts and bruises than I can count."

Jasper blinked, remembering belatedly that Carlisle was in med school. Of course he'd know better than most victim's families Jasper had encountered.

"That being said, he'll recover," Carlisle concluded.

"Yes," Jasper nodded. "He's a strong kid. He was very brave throughout all of this. It's more than anyone should have to go through."

Both men grimaced, nodding in fervent agreement.

"Anyway, I also wanted to let you know. Felix Bartolini, Aro Scarpinato, and three others who were in the van with Bartolini were arrested, the last of them about twenty minutes ago." He breathed deep. "I believe we've got everyone who was involved, but just in case, there's a guard detail posted at each entrance of the hospital." He gave a small shrug. "It'll help keep the press out, anyway."

The D.A. offered his hand, shaking Jasper's firmly. "Thank you," he said again.

_**~0~** _

Jasper was sitting with his hands clasped in front of him, staring out the window

His mind vacillated, Irina's words about projecting his situation on Edward's ringing in his thoughts.

He'd lost consciousness after the last vicious beating James had delivered and awaken with Peter's soft, teary voice calling his name. In the hospital, he'd quickly gotten annoyed at the gentleness in Peter's tone. It was as if his lover thought his voice had the power to break Jasper.

Thinking back to how Edward, despite his injuries and the fact that there was gunfire going on right above their heads, had tried to walk out of the house under his own power, Jasper wondered if the kid would react similarly.

Jasper hadn't been the world's best patient, particularly when his parents and sister were around. He'd pushed his limits, pretending he wasn't hurting, wasn't exhausted.

Of course, the kid wouldn't be able to pretend what he'd been through wasn't as bad as all that. Almost every torture that had been inflicted on him had been caught on video. His whole family, his girlfriend, had seen the most heinous of what had happened to him. There would be no downplaying that.

The idea of his mother, his sister, or even Peter knowing the extent of his weakness - how he'd screamed when James really hurt him, or the way he'd moaned pitifully in the darkness of his prison - was abhorrent. Yet that was what Irina repeatedly told him he had to do - open up to his family and those close to him about exactly what had happened, how it felt.

Reliving it, surrounded by the safety of those who loved and accepted him, was supposed to be healing. The idea made Jasper nauseous. He wanted to be tougher than that, especially in front of his family. What would they think if they knew?

Jasper wiped his hands over his jaw absently, and nearly jumped out of his skin the next second when Emmett clapped his shoulder.

"The bad guys are behind bars, the kid is gonna live - with all his fingers and toes, mind - and the paperwork is as done as it's gonna get at -" he consulted his cell phone "- six on a Friday night. I say we call this a win and go celebrate with Rose. I mean.. at the Cherry Pit."

The various agents around whooped, throwing fists in the air. Despite their injured colleague, spirits were high in the face of this win.

And most of them were looking at him like he was a God. Again.

Including...

"Congratulations, Agent Whitlock," Riley said quietly, and yet Jasper heard his voice above the sudden cacophony of agents patting each other on the back.

"Biers, you're coming with, right?" Emmett asked.

"Naw, not this time," Riley said bashfully, staring at the ground though Jasper could see he was smiling. "You guys go on without me."

Jasper watched him slip through the crowd, disappearing out the door.

Riley still looked at him like he was a God, even though he'd seen Jasper at his worst. He'd seen him shaking in tears - a sight not even James had been able to reduce him to - had seen him be a complete ass, and yet still looked at him like he was a savior.

Riley didn't make him feel weaker.

Again, Jasper was startled when Emmett slung an arm around his shoulders. "Come on, Whitlock. Let's get out drink on."

"No," Jasper said before he could think about it. He reached across, smacking Emmett's chest lightly. "You drink enough for the both of us. I got somewhere I should be."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: That's it! The end!
> 
> What? The kid was rescued... nothing left to do, right?
> 
> Oh. There is THAT. Well, okay, if you insist.
> 
> Remember when this was gonna be 5-7 chapters? Chyeah. Well, anyway. Next chapter IS, in fact, the last chapter.
> 
> In the meantime, I HIGHLY. HIGHLY. HIGHLY. Recommend Plummy's submission to the age of Edward contest - a delicious Jasper/Edward period piece called The Shipyard.
> 
> Thanks to jfka06 and barburella!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedication: To Tkegl. Thank you for the prompt. It was fun. I hope you're pleased.

"Not going to the party, Riley?"

With a sigh, Riley came to a halt. He'd been hoping he could get to the door without Bree seeing him, but no such luck. Turning to face her, he put on a careful smile. "I don't feel like drinking tonight, that's all."

She rolled her eyes. "You lie like a rug, Biers." She grimaced, looking him over. "You're avoiding Whitlock. What you should be doing is going to that bar and showing him you don't need him to have a good time. Show him what he's missing."

Riley snorted softly, looking down. "What is he missing?" He shook his head. "Nothing's changed, Bree. I'm still a techie dweeb, good for a quick fuck, but not much else." He grimaced, knowing he'd let too much slip. He'd been trying to talk himself out of his hurt for days now, trying to chalk it all up to wounded pride.

The truth was, in the last few weeks, his minor infatuation with the blond haired agent had completely taken over his thoughts. He'd seen so many different sides of Jasper. True, not all of them had been attractive, particularly when the other man had let it be known how little he thought of Riley, but the picture as a whole was...

Well, Riley had an inkling that life could be really good. Not without its challenges, but interesting.

Jasper was the first man in a long time that had listened so intently to Riley's ramblings. Not only had he listened, but he'd actually processed what Riley was saying. A lot of men heard Riley's words and looked at the lack of confidence behind them as something that needed to be fixed. It was one of the reasons Riley had stopped dating. He was sick of the inevitable lectures about how he was such a catch.

Riley simply understood how the world worked and accepted it for what it was. He knew he was a good man, and that in a relationship, he would be kind and giving. He was the type of guy who would do anything for the man he loved. He had a lot to offer.

Just because he was a nice guy, though, didn't mean that all the men in the world would or should be falling over themselves to get to him. It didn't mean that just because he'd shared a handful of intimate moments with a man, that he should fall head over heels in love.

With a sigh, Riley looked at Bree and smiled a little. "What am I going to do in a room full of macho FBI agents anyway, huh? Can't exactly show anyone what they're missing if I can't pick up a guy of my own."

"Ah!" Bree said, holding a finger and waggling her eyebrows. "I took the liberty of doing some recon for you. I think you and Agent Clearwater would get along famously."

Riley wrinkled his nose. "Leah? Are you mental, Tanner? I know she's gruffer than most of the guys out there, but she still lacks the equipment I'm looking for."

"Not Leah, dumbass. Her little brother joined up, or hadn't you heard? Rookie is cute. His name is Seth, he's just about as sweet as pie, and he's ridiculously cut," Bree babbled excitedly. When Riley frowned, she sighed, looking exasperated. "Riley, seriously. You could do with a casual fuck to pass the time, work Whitlock out of your system. Seth is hot. If it weren't for Diego, I'd be all about lamenting the fact he bats for your team."

"Why do so many people think the key to everything is sex?" Riley muttered, running a restless hand through his hair. "I'll be fine," he insisted.

"You should still go," Bree said stubbornly. "I mean, it's kind of bullshit. Everyone is gonna be patting Whitlock on the back when you were the one who had to pull him back together."

Riley narrowed his eyes. "I knew I shouldn't have told you that," he muttered. "Bree, you can't tell anyone about that."

She put her hands up in a placating gesture. "I told you I wouldn't say anything. You know you can trust me. I'm just saying, you should make it a little difficult for him, that's all. If it weren't for you -"

"He would have managed," Riley interrupted, trying to temper the tone of his voice. Bree was grating on his nerves. "No one is invincible. It's only logical that he'd need a minute every once in a while, and no one should be alone through that. That's all."

Bree chuckled at him. "Oh, Riley. Your loyalty is hard to shake, isn't it?"

**~0~**

Riley didn't go home immediately. Instead, he drove around, trying to sort out his thoughts.

As he'd told Jasper, it seemed that Riley's viewpoint on the world made him easy to take advantage of. As a result, he was nervous and perhaps a little over cautious around people. It was, he'd admitted to himself on many a long night, a lonely existence.

Then again, he'd also done the casual sex thing. It wasn't hard, really, to find someone who was just looking for a quick fuck. It didn't take much talking to find a willing body. There was no waffling over compatibility. If physical affection were all he wanted, Riley could understand the appeal, but inevitably, when he invited a man to his bed with only sex in mind, the night ended with a feeling of emptiness as he looked on the near stranger next to him.

There was an old song lyric that had always struck him.  _If I must be lonely, I think I'd rather be alone_.

But falling asleep next to Jasper, he'd felt...

Well, he hadn't felt empty.

Riley squirmed in his seat, tapping his fingers restlessly on the steering wheel.

During their sessions, Irina had lightly suggested that maybe Riley chose to fixate on these boys - men - who were unrealistic for him because it would be easier not to get invested. They would never choose him, so how could he ever have a lasting relationship, risk his heart to that degree?

The problem was that Jasper had cracked that first line of defense, slipped deeper into Riley's psyche, among other things. He wasn't the high school jock who had beat Riley senseless for even thinking to look on him that way. In fact, when Jasper realized Riley's attraction, he'd been tender and self-deprecating.

And there was the way Jasper had been with Alice. How easily he could have let go of the little girl, never thinking of her again. It couldn't have been easy for him to see her. After all, it was because of her that he'd been through hell.

Before all of this, perhaps Riley could have admitted that his attraction to Jasper was an attraction more to the idea of him - the fair haired hero - than the actual man. Now, though, it was personal.

Much, much harder to let go of.

Sighing, Riley pulled up to his place, trying to breathe through the ache at the center of his chest, trying to convince himself to let go of impossible daydreams.

Riley had almost gotten to his door before he registered the quick footfalls of someone approaching behind him. He spun, his heart rate accelerating with a rush of fear that turned into shock. "J...A-agent Whitlock?"

Jasper looked down for a moment, looking uncharacteristically nervous for reasons Riley couldn't even guess. "I, um. I think we're past this Agent Whitlock business, Riley. What do you think?"

"Yeah, okay," Riley murmured, rubbing the back of his head self consciously.

They stared at each other, the moment awkward. Jasper shifted his weight. "I... well. Can we talk?"

"Oh! Right, I'm sorry. I should invite you in, right?" Riley said, grimacing because he always felt even more bumbling than usual around Jasper.

Jasper just laughed. "Well, I don't know. After everything, I might not invite me in," he said softly.

Riley narrowed his eyes slightly, a little confused, but rather than ask what the other man meant, he stepped up to the door, sliding the key into the lock. "What is it they say? Water under the bridge?" he stepped inside, holding the door open for Jasper. "Anyway, what are you doing here?" he asked, not unkindly. "Shouldn't you be out celebrating?"

"Wasn't in the mood," Jasper answered with a shrug.

"Okay," Riley said slowly, not quite knowing what he was supposed to say or think in this situation. "So you came here?"

"Been waiting in my car for about an hour, now," Jasper said with a cheeky grin. "I was beginning to think you had a hot date."

Riley blushed before he could help it, looking down at his feet. "No, not me. I was just... Well, I wasn't doing much of anything to be honest. Do you want something to drink?"

"Sure. You have beer?"

"No, uh. I really hate that stuff," Riley admitted sheepishly. "I think I have some rum. But mostly, I have Mountain Dew."

"Mountain Dew?"

"Yeah, it's kind of a nerd staple."

Jasper looked down, his lips pursed in a grin. "Yeah, sure. I haven't had that stuff since college."

Riley retrieved the cans, coming back out into the living room. Jasper was perusing his bookshelves with what appeared to be great curiosity.

"Thanks," Jasper murmured, taking the can without looking away from Riley's shelves. "I'd have taken you for a sci-fi buff. Isn't that the stereotype? But this is all non-fiction."

"Umm... would you understand what I meant if I said I like war? Not that I'd ever want to be in one... could you imagine me as some sort of army leader? I'd be horrible." Riley shook his head. "But the tactics of war, the reasons behind it..." He shrugged.

"I can understand that," Jasper said with a nod.

"But I prefer fantasy to sci-fi," Riley admitted.

Jasper looked up at him and grinned in that way that made Riley feel entirely too warm and tingly inside. "It's the dragon sex, right? Big lizards mating in mid-air."

Riley's lips quirked upward. "Nah... it's the dwarfs. They're just the right height, you know."

It took Jasper a minute to get it, but when he did, he threw his head back in laughter. Riley couldn't help the way he grinned stupidly, ridiculously happy that he could make Jasper laugh like that.

A minute later they were seated on Riley's couch, drinking quietly. Finally, Jasper sighed. "Look, I'm not good at this."

"What's this?" Riley asked softly.

Jasper grimaced. "Well, first thing's first... I really never apologized for the, uh, misunderstanding a couple of weeks ago." He looked up, holding Riley's gaze with utter sincerity. "I am truly sorry. I never meant to belittle you like that."

"Water under the bridge," Riley murmured again, looking down.

"You're very forgiving," Jasper observed. "So, obviously, this case has been... trying for me, and it's made me think a lot. They all praise me, and think I'm great at what I do - and I am... but I have to give credit where credit is due. I have to admit that, without you, I would have been off the Cullen case completely. Without you, I would probably be back out on leave."

Riley chuffed, blushing furiously. "I think you're underestimating yourself. You would have been fine."

Jasper's eyes were intense on his, so much so that Riley felt slightly dizzy. "I wouldn't have been fine, Riley. I was a mess." He frowned. "I am a mess," he amended quietly.

An odd expression came over his face then, and it took Riley a minute to realize that he wasn't the only one blushing.

"I've been over and over this in my head so many times..." Jasper muttered. "There's no way to say this without sounding like an idiot, but it's true." He looked Riley in the eye again, his expression soft, affectionate even. "Everyone thinks I'm a hero. Well, you're my hero."

Riley blinked sporadically, sure that he'd heard the words wrong. He opened his mouth, but his tongue was tied, his thoughts completely blank. He closed his mouth, then opened it again, only a strangled little noise coming out.

Jasper's smile was small but genuine. "You don't have to say anything. I'm just stating facts is all," he murmured, his eyes straying down, looking at Riley's lips.

Riley was suddenly very aware of how close they were sitting on the couch. When had that happened?

"Though, I do thank you for not laughing at me," Jasper continued, raising his hand and placing two fingers under Riley's chin.

"I um... I mean...," Riley stumbled, his lips open and his throat suddenly tight with nerves and anticipation. "It wasn't... it wasn't funny. It was..."

But how did he explain?

No one had ever told him something like that, and it made him happy. Happy and...

And Jasper was looking at him again, his eyes darkened. He tilted his head head forward slightly, waiting.

For a moment, Riley's mind was all want, and he held his breath, not quite able to grasp what he thought was about to happen. It had been minutes since he'd decided he needed to get past this, and yet here he was... If Jasper leaned in even another fraction of an inch, they would be kissing.

Riley breathed in, tasting the hot air the other man breathed out as his head spun crazily, vacillating between a want so desperate he wanted to cry out and fear because if he let this happen again, he was putting his heart on the line.

Swallowing hard past the lump in his throat, Riley reached out, tentatively wrapping Jasper's tie around and around his fingers. For one more second, he stared into the other man's eyes, and a stunning moment of clarity hit him.

Perhaps it was true that Jasper was a thousand times more confident than Riley would ever be. Maybe it was true that more people looked up to him. Arguably, Jasper was more handsome than Riley, definitely he was more fit.

But as Riley looked into the blond man's eyes, he recognized that he was just as scared. If their lips met this time, things would change. What that meant for each of them individually, and them as a pair, neither could tell.

Jasper was leaving it up to him to make the choice for both of them.

Closing his eyes, Riley pushed back every doubt and listened to his instincts. He tugged on Jasper's tie, and the blond man obeyed his silent direction, tilting his head and pressing his lips to Riley's.

The instant their lips met, Riley knew he'd made the right choice. It was a risk, and whatever they were about to get into wasn't going to be easy, but even in those first few seconds, it was already worth every moment of heartache he might face in the future.

When they were both breathless, their hands tangled up in each others dress shirts and tugging on ties, Jasper broke their kiss. "Take me to your bed," he growled, and anything Riley might have said was lost, lust instantly clouding every coherent thought in his head.

He nodded, licking his lips as he tried to catch his breath. "Okay," he agreed breathlessly, standing.

Jasper stood with him, his hands cupping Riley's face as he leaned forward, kissing him again sweetly, his tongue lapping. It reminded Riley of the first time they kissed and the way the other man had murmured, "sweet," against his skin.

Riley shivered, anticipation and want mingling with something distinctly more saccharine than that first kiss had been. Everything before had that certain edge of desperation - Jasper trying to outrun his fears and his perceived weakness. It was good - so good - but that was why the air had been thick with a bittersweet after taste when all was said and done.

This wasn't the same at all. Riley laughed breathlessly as Jasper let him go again only to wrap his arms around his waist. The blond man nuzzled his neck, kissing the sensitive skin at the nape while he pushed Riley forward, stumbling every few steps.

In his bedroom, Jasper spun him around again, walking him backward until Riley felt his bed at the back of his legs. He sat, staring up at the other man, and his breath caught.

Jasper was looking down at him with an inexplicable tenderness, almost as awed and thankful as Riley felt. The blond man raised his hand slowly, drawing the back of his knuckles down one of Riley's cheek, then the other. He traced the tip of his nose and ran the pad of his finger over Riley's full lips.

Swallowing thickly, Riley moved his fingers to the bottom button of Jasper's dress shirt, unbuttoning as he stared up. It was strange to communicate so silently, but it was amazing how many words he heard in their quiet actions. There was such affection in the way he smiled, threading his fingers through Riley's hair as the younger man unbuttoned and unzipped.

Riley ran his hands down Jasper's chest over his open shirt. He felt unusually brave. He knew well enough that vulnerability wasn't easy for a man like Jasper. Being a little bolder in bed was the least he could do, even though he felt hopelessly out of his depth.

When he stood again, they came together for another kiss. Riley pretended his hands weren't shaking as he pushed Jasper's pants down along with his boxers, feeling his hot length brush his fingers.

Moaning into his mouth, Jasper took over. How his fingers could be so deft, working the buttons of his shirt with ease even as his tongue urged Riley's mouth open, Riley couldn't quite understand. His kisses were thoroughly energetic. Riley wouldn't have had the presence of mind to keep up a kiss like this and undress a man at the same time.

"Do you have condoms?" Jasper asked, kissing a trail up to Riley's ear.

Riley huffed, trying to wrap his head around those words. His mind, among other things, was thick with lust. "I thought you were always prepared."

Jasper snickered, and kissed him sweetly again. "Jacket is the other room," he rumbled, placing kiss after kiss along Riley's cheekbone. "I'm really not in the mood to leave."

Swallowing most of a groan, Riley tried to think. "Nightstand," he finally murmured.

"Perfect." Jasper grinned, tugging Riley's shirt off his shoulders. Hooking his fingers in Riley's belt loops, the blond man tugged him forward so their bare chests brushed as they kissed. He pulled his pants down and off so they were both nude, cocks bumping. Jasper spun him around, and Riley gave a little gasp, wondering if it would be unattractive to beg.

He was so ready.

Jasper's hands were at his waist tracing small circles. He bent, kissing the side of Riley's neck, teasing with his teeth until the younger man whimpered with need. "Please," Riley whispered.

"Lay down," Jasper directed.

Complying, Riley first knelt and then laid forward on the bed, cradling his head in his arms. It was slightly nerve wracking, lying there exposed, but the bed dipped only a moment later, and he felt Jasper's warm hand flat on the small of his back.

Again, Jasper's touch was slow and tender. Almost too slow. Riley craved more, harder, but he also didn't want to ruin the moment. As much as he wanted Jasper inside him, now, the build up was its own kind of ecstasy.

There was Jasper, running his tongue up Riley's spine, eliciting little whines from the back of his throat.

There was the way the blond man let his weight press Riley into the bed as he reached across him, fumbling through the bric a brac in the nightstand drawer until he pulled out a condom and the lube Riley had there.

Riley sighed and moaned as Jasper entered him first with a finger, spreading the lube as he nipped lightly at his shoulder, and then with his thick length.

This was how lovers spoke, Riley realized, with their bodies and the sounds of their pleasure.

The way Jasper's lips brushed the shell of his ear as he moved inside him was intimate and wonderful, a titillation Riley could not have predicted. When he was close, Jasper buried his head at Riley's neck, his mouth open and breath hot and wet against his skin. He threaded their fingers together, squeezing tightly as he worked in and out of him at a fevered pace.

The way Jasper cried his name, muffled as it was with his lips on his skin, was one of the best moments of Riley's life.

_**~0~** _

Riley groaned, trying to figure out what had woken him from such a sound, deep sleep.

A cell phone was ringing close by. Something urgent. Maybe work at this time of night.

He tried to move but found himself anchored. There was a disgruntled groan of protest, and Riley woke further, remembering.

If he had to put words to what had happened that night, Riley could only think to say that he and Jasper had fucked themselves stupid before passing out cold in each others' arms.

He smiled widely and wiggled again, trying to remember where he'd put his phone. This time Jasper growled in his sleep, holding him only tighter.

"Jasper," he whispered, realizing abruptly that it was not his ringtone going off. "Your phone. It might be important."

Again Jasper groaned but he blinked, trying to wake up. "What?" he asked dumbly.

Riley had to laugh at the confused expression on his face. "Your phone is ringing. It might be important," he reiterated.

"Take a message," Jasper mumbled, attempting to go back to cuddling.

"Not your secretary," Riley admonished, rolling over and getting up. He ignored Jasper's groans as he looked around the room, trying to figure out where the sounds were coming from. "It must be important," he muttered. "They've called like three times now."

Finding the cell phone in Jasper's pants, he tossed it on the bed while the blond man dug the heels of palms into his eyes. He blinked blearily at the phone. "It's Dr. Ivanova," he muttered with a frown.

"I can..." Riley gestured to the door.

Jasper just shook his head. "No, this won't take long. Come back to bed."

It was amazing and slightly surreal to hear Jasper speak those words. He climbed back into bed, laying his head on his folded hands.

As Jasper spoke, he ran his fingers absently through Riley's hair. Riley would have purred if he could.

He had almost been lulled back to sleep when he picked up on the tone of Jasper's voice.

Nervous.

Suspicious.

"I'm sorry I didn't call tonight, Doctor. I was otherwise occupied," Jasper said tightly. "But besides that... I think... Well, I don't think that this is going to work."

Riley's heart fell down into his stomach when he realized what was going on.

Letting Jasper know Irina's connection to the men who'd hurt him was a mistake. He'd been tactless. Careless.

Jasper hung up with a sigh, laying back down. He tilted his head, looking at Riley curiously.

"What are you thinking about, looking so serious?"

"I'm sorry," Riley murmured. "I shouldn't have told you about her."

"Yeah, you should have."

"No. I shouldn't have. I told you it didn't matter, but I understand why it does to you. And it's a set back." Riley frowned. "You don't need that."

"I don't need..." Jasper started to snap and then slumped back on the pillows. "Fuck," he said, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "That's... that's going to be hard."

"What?"

Jasper threw an arm up, his expression wry. "Admitting I need help," he said softly.

"We both have our things," Riley observed, watching Jasper closely, waiting for him to bolt.

Jasper breathed in and out, deep and slow. He opened his eyes and when he looked at Riley he was smiling. "If you can be patient with me, we can figure this out," he said quietly.

Riley felt a grin tug at his lips. "I um... You know, I take a little patience, too."

Jasper laid his hand between them, palm up and open in an offer. "I can be patient, when I try."

Riley threaded their fingers together. "Yeah. Me, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I am more than likely going to do a futuretake, but for now, I mark this closed.
> 
> This fic could not have been accomplished without the love and support of plummy, jfka06, jadedandboring, and barburella. And all of you, of course, who make writing so worthwhile.
> 
> If you're so inclined, there's a lot of slash on my docket. All of it Jasper centric. I know for sure there's going to be a Jasper/Emmett fic called Notes on the Fridge that I'll be publishing shortly, probably after Wicked is complete. There is also a Jasper/Edward and a... a... a JasperCarlisleOMGWhoAmI I am almost certain to do.


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